Archive: 7 posts

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Newly released level, made by DerVonKleist, published by Joeharris: The Dark Side of the Far North. http://lbp.me/v/c-zx70 Level Description: A shroud descends over the Far North, the behemoth awakes.

2012-06-25 15:21:00 Author: Unknown User

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Sounds cool. I'll check this out when i'll got time.

2012-06-26 13:53:00 Author: Zhibou Posts: 14

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added to the queue

2012-06-26 14:08:00 Author: biorogue Posts: 8424

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Alright, I have played this level, and here's what I thought. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- No offence or anything, but I wasn't very keen on the introduction. It's not that there were any flaws in grammar or punctuation, no, that was good and polished, but it could've been more interesting. The conversation with Felix, while helpful in explaining what's going on, drags out to fifteen lines of speech repeating multiple things, and the guy's voice gets irritating when having to listen to it that long. There are ways you can condense certain parts, and you can mention the snowshape gasser afterwards, instead of in the intro speech, like, maybe good 'ol Christopher pops up again to tell you after you walk across the building some. If it is necessary though that you keep most of what he said, then perhaps show the bot talking at first, but then show some actual scenes. For example, maybe switch over to Santa with some warheads, when Felix says "Santa has grown disillusioned with the current generation of offspring and shifted from the production of toys to the production of awesome war weapons, ones more powerful than any this planet has ever seen.". Hopefully you get the idea to what I mean. (Oh, by the way, just a tiny nitpick of mine, but once Felix is done talking, there's a pause you have to wait through before being able to roam around. If you could shorten this 'pause', that'd be swell.) Like I said earlier, maybe have the snowshape gasser appear a little later. It seems a little useless that Felix mentioned how it was in the storage room, when the tow of you were already in the storage room. So, it might've been interesting to travel the building a little, and then get introduced to it by him. Also, I like the idea of the elf camp, but it, along with the storage room, could use some polishing. Some materials you've used work together sorta, while others, do not. I'd recommend lowering the amount of materials. Some have succeeded before in using all kinds of crazy materials, and end up with a real wacky-looking level, but it is no easy task, and this doesn't seem like it's supposed to be a crazy fun-house of some mad man, like material overdose levels that excel in that feature seem to be about. But like I said, some are fine there, like the metal, snow, ground and crates. Others, such as the rubber bands....not so much. Also, a little bit of "effects" here and there could really spruce things up by the way. I like how you attempted the Free Elf tent, but make it all that weird, clear material, just doesn't seem to be working. My guess is it's supposed to be frozen, which makes sense in the frigid environment, but perhaps show what the tent really looks like, but still add a little ice on there or something. That way you still give off the cold feeling of the setting. Another idea that could be better done, no offence, are when you show fur. I'm pretty sure the orange fur is meant to show part of the trees not fully covered in snow, which is cool, but perhaps fur isn't the best to use there, idk. Also, black fur can seem a bit weird, sticking out of the snow the way it is. Now, onto the elf fortress. The elf designs themselves are simple and effective, but they can be frustrating. The one on the bottom layer shoots you before you get a chance at first, which makes it really annoying, at first I mean. If you could add something to it more, (perhaps you have to be stealthy) it might be more enjoyable, as you can easily get the one in the top layer, as you just need to perform a long range shot. More elves come, although this time they move. Still a little frustrating as they attack automatically, and for me, I had to get close to some to get them in time, killing myself along with them. So, in my opinion, I think this little target practice area could use some work, and maybe have more to it, to make it a more enjoyable experience. Guards in the second level are pretty easy to tackle, and then comes the tall, green enemy. A pretty cool design, and it might not be necessary to some, but it would be appreciated if you could say "where to hit", even if it's kind of obvious later. Also, in the little movie cut-scene, introducing the green guy, he's still moving while you're stuck, and can easily walk over and kill you, like he did for me. I know lives are infinite, but cheap kills like this can be pretty irritating for some players. The elf after the green guy is up near the switch, but moves where you are once you get near him. I was near him once getting on the elevator, but I was in the back layer. Once moving to his layer, we were both automatically killed. He just shot, right with me, giving me no chance to shoot him first. Sure, he died too, but it was still a little irritating. Now, moving on, towards the conveyor belt! Over on the right of the first belt, there's a slide you can go on in the back layer. It's obviously your only way to move on, but a little sign wouldn't hurt. Also, it might be a little annoying, but maybe add a sound right before a bomb is dropped. I don't know though, I know they drop rapidly, so that could get irritating. Perhaps slow them down at first? Also, I'd make more of the slide available to get on in the back layer, as it doesn't seem to be an integral part of that area, the beginning of the slide I mean, and it really is. So then we arrive in the area in the picture below. http://lbp.me/p/qrkeg3d If you happen to die and come out of this checkpoint while a bomb is sliding by, you get yourself killed, despite being in the back layer. Also, dropping down from the middle layer where the slide is, to the bottom layer where the belt is can be a little difficult at times, as instead of dropping down like you did from checkpoint to slide, you just jump most of the time, which can be a problem with the bombs rapidly sliding in your direction then. So maybe move the checkpoint away from the remaining part of the slide, so you don't have to run into those little errors. It's good to see you added in some "smashers" to the conveyor belt, I mean, what would a factory be without them? Still, there could have been a little...mixing up. Maybe add other machines to go along with the smashers, and maybe you have to switch between layers, with different conveyor belts on different layers. There was a sound thrown in for them I think, but not when they hit against the belt. I'd add more sounds to the smashers, and maybe when they smash against fiery obstacles, I'd add in some harmless, thin pieces of burnt material show up, to add to the effect of it truly smashing into it, since the smashers don't even really touch the burnt platforms. More elf-bots appear, although the one in the back layer rams into the switch and kills itself. I'm not sure if that was intended, but I'm guessing not. A few sounds could be added on the elevator ride, like a sound for when it's moving, and one for when it reaches the top. More green men appear, killing you in the movie cutscenes where you cannot move once again. The changing angle from the checkpoint to the area with them could be better done by the way. Finally, the boss. Well, I'm glad we get to see what Santa really looks like after all, but sadly, the boss battle itself was pretty disappointing. Only one move was used, Santa's fart, which basically killed you if you were in that layer. I suppose the fart sound was a warning, but not a good one at first. There should be some sort of warning, so you know to change layers. Also, the back layer is simply a safe zone. No harm is done there, and it ends up being real easy. Simply get in the back layer, hang around that angle, drop down, shoot, get back up in that layer, repeat process until boss is over. I mean, I know in the end, Santa wins, but it still would've been nice to see more to it. And I was kind of hoping, considering Felix decided to talk about it, that we'd get to actually see who this "behemoth" actually was, but it seems like that was sort of left out at the end. THE GLITCHES. -------------------------- 1. Only one glitch here, an escape glitch. When you first arrive on the conveyor belt, run left, jump on a certain angle, you can corner jump and make it over the slant, keep running left, and escape the level. I was only able to do this once though, and couldn't replicate it, so it can be very hard to pull off, but I'd still keep that in mind, so maybe add a giant wall up, to the left of the slant. Here's a picture to show you what I mean. http://lbp.me/p/qrke9qv ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Overall, this had some good ideas, but could use some polishing. The introduction could be made shorter so it doesn't feel as dragged out. You can lower on the materials, and swap different things in for some neat effects. Certain parts of gameplay can be made more enjoyable such as shooting down the elves, and even the conveyor belt part could add more to it, although it's no doubt a good start. The boss left me disappointed, and there was sadly no mention of the behemoth by the time it was over. Still though, it was a good try, and fun playing. I hope you understand that I mean no disrespect towards you or your level, and I hope you take some of the points I made into consideration.

2012-06-26 14:50:00 Author: Dragonvarsity Posts: 5208

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Thanks for playing the level. No offense taken, as all that you said was valid constructive criticism. I agree with you on a lot of what you suggested; I probably put some of it into action. Regarding the behemoth, I was using the word metaphorically to describe Santa and his war machine (not a literal machine). That might have not been conveyed very well by Felix Christopher. Again, thanks for actually playing the level and taking the time to write a detailed suggestions list.

2012-06-26 16:59:00 Author: Unknown User

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Thanks for playing the level. No offense taken, as all that you said was valid constructive criticism. I agree with you on a lot of what you suggested; I probably put some of it into action. Regarding the behemoth, I was using the word metaphorically to describe Santa and his war machine (not a literal machine). That might have not been conveyed very well by Felix Christopher. Again, thanks for actually playing the level and taking the time to write a detailed suggestions list. Any time. I'm glad to see the amount of levels people still churn out there, and well, I just love reviewing levels. xD I'm glad that you didn't take any of my points the wrong way, and it's your level in the end, what you do to the level is up to you, my job is to just give you some positives/negatives to give some thought about. Oh, and my mistake about the behemoth. I was thinking that it might actually mean something else, but I just had to make sure. Thanks for clearing that up for me. If you do release an update for your level by the way, I'd be happy to play it again and tell you what I think - just make sure to message me once you do! It doesn't take long for a level thread to wind up on Page 2, even after being posted on.

2012-06-26 18:31:00 Author: Dragonvarsity Posts: 5208

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Sounds pretty sweet I'm adding it to my queue and I will give it a go soon !

2012-06-26 19:58:00 Author: Pyrotrooper91 Posts: 337

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