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#1

Dumbest...Thing...Ever.

Archive: 123 posts

Some of you have probably seen this before, but this is a first for me.
I have a jar of peanuts at my house. It says "PEANUTS" in big, bold, white letters in the front. Under it, it shows a huge pile of peanuts. The jar is, you guessed it, translucent, so you can see ALL of the peanuts in it. I turn the jar around. On the back, it says "Allergen Statement: Contains peanuts".
FAIL.
I just wanted to put that out there. So yeah. Have you seen anything completely stupid lately? You know, just things that would normally take common sense to figure out.		2011-11-02 17:26:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

A cooker with a warning sign: Danger:Hot!2011-11-02 17:29:00

Author:
Valeview
Posts: 1581

;-;





... ANYWAY... can't think of a good joke, so...

... Dumbest thing I've seen... uh... can't think of anything. Want to think of joke concerning original's post's subject matter, but I got nothing >_>		2011-11-02 17:30:00

Author:
RockSauron
Posts: 10882

... Dumbest thing I've seen... uh... can't think of anything. Want to think of joke concerning original's post's subject matter, but I got nothing >_>

http://img51.imageshack.us/img51/1835/kiddingme.png		2011-11-02 17:50:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

http://images.wikia.com/half-life/en/images/d/de/P2_glados.jpg

He's the product of the greatest minds of a generation working together with the
express purpose of building the dumbest moron who ever lived.
http://roboteyetheater.com/images/2011%20images/portal-2-review/wheatley.jpg		2011-11-02 19:03:00

Author:
nysudyrgh
Posts: 5482

my little brother has a 125 honda dirt bike, and under the back finder it says "do not eat"2011-11-02 19:21:00

Author:
aceofthorns
Posts: 288

On some meat packaging I've seen, it says: "Warning: contains meat."2011-11-02 20:23:00

Author:
FlipMeister
Posts: 631

In a maternity ward:
"No children allowed."		2011-11-02 20:46:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

Cooking mah totally awesome hot pocket: box says "warning: cooking makes product hot."2011-11-02 21:40:00

Author:
Unknown User

I saw an iron that said Warning: Hot.
I wish I had a tag that said that... But I don't, because I'm ugly.
http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRI5htS3KAgzlQIXTVuj1Klb3XBR1ZKh i6yWZ7EvNFLgkMnTkZs		2011-11-02 22:03:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

They have to put obvious labels because it usually means that someone has actually tried to do it before. :eek:2011-11-02 22:04:00

Author:
warlord_evil
Posts: 4193

On my cereal bowl :

"IKEA of Sweden
Made In China".

Thank globalization...		2011-11-02 22:07:00

Author:
Oddmania
Posts: 1305

I saw a toy fire extinguisher, it was only about 2" tall, with a warning saying not to use it for real fires 2011-11-02 23:36:00

Author:
SR20DETDOG
Posts: 2431

"Slippery when wet"....? So its slippery when its dry?2011-11-03 00:04:00

Author:
DominationMags
Posts: 1840

My daughter's Hair dryer says "do not use in shower" :/ Really, cause I always like to dry my hair as I'm wetting it.
On Apple's website there is a warning label for the shuffle that says "Do not eat Ipod shuffle"
then there's this
https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-JYxPrVh7Y0I/TrHnq9k28II/AAAAAAAAA8s/ZEQ3OLiBg1Q/s272/a94_w10.jpg		2011-11-03 02:01:00

Author:
biorogue
Posts: 8424

I actually have a book with a section entitled: "Dumb Directions on Products!"

Here's some of the labels it has that I find pointless, contradictory or stupid:

Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish. On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.

Keep away from children. On a bottle of baby lotion.

Do not use while sleeping. On a hairdryer.

NEVER use while sleeping. On a propane blowtorch.

Do not take if allergic to aspirin. On a bottle of ASPIRIN.

Some assembly required. On a 500 piece jigsaw puzzle.

May be harmful if swallowed. On a shipment of hammers.

Instructions: Put on food. On a bottle of ketchup.

*OP label*

Warning: May cause drowsiness. On a bottle of sleeping pills.

Remove plastic before eating. On the wrapper of a fruit snack.

Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth. On a rock gardening kit.

All true labels!
There's many others but I think this'll suffice 		2011-11-03 02:43:00

Author:
Fang
Posts: 578

Lol Awesome stuff Fang, i couldnt stop laughing at those labels.2011-11-03 02:55:00

Author:
Tyranny68
Posts: 390

I actually have a book with a section entitled: "Dumb Directions on Products!"

Here's some of the labels it has that I find pointless, contradictory or stupid:

Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish. On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.

Keep away from children. On a bottle of baby lotion.

Do not use while sleeping. On a hairdryer.

NEVER use while sleeping. On a propane blowtorch.

Do not take if allergic to aspirin. On a bottle of ASPIRIN.

Some assembly required. On a 500 piece jigsaw puzzle.

May be harmful if swallowed. On a shipment of hammers.

Instructions: Put on food. On a bottle of ketchup.

*OP label*

Warning: May cause drowsiness. On a bottle of sleeping pills.

Remove plastic before eating. On the wrapper of a fruit snack.

Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth. On a rock gardening kit.

All true labels!
There's many others but I think this'll suffice

It boggles the mind when you think of all the people struggling to find work while people are actually getting paid to put these little pearls of wisdom on products. I would really like to meet these people.		2011-11-03 10:31:00

Author:
carringtonandrew
Posts: 85

"Learn how to read here!"
On a poster.
D'oh.		2011-11-03 18:57:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

Dot dot dot...

Product Warnings:

"Do not use if you cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet." -- In the information booklet.
"Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.
"For external use only!" -- On a curling iron.
"Warning: This product can burn eyes." -- On a curling iron.
"Do not use in shower." -- On a hair dryer.
"Do not use while sleeping." -- On a hair dryer.
"Do not use while sleeping or unconscious." -- On a hand-held massaging device.
"Do not place this product into any electronic equipment." -- On the case of a chocolate CD in a gift basket.
"Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking." -- On a toilet at a public sports facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan.
"Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." -- On a pair of shin guards made for bicyclists.
"This product not intended for use as a dental drill." -- On an electric rotary tool.
"Caution: Do not spray in eyes." -- On a container of underarm deodorant.
"Do not drive with sunshield in place." -- On a cardboard sunshield that keeps the sun off the dashboard.
"Caution: This is not a safety protective device." -- On a plastic toy helmet used as a container for popcorn.
"Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks." -- On an "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter.
"Battery may explore or leak." -- On a battery. See a scanned image.
"Do not eat toner." -- On a toner cartridge for a laser printer.
"Not intended for highway use." -- On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow.
"This product is not to be used in bathrooms." -- On a Holmes bathroom heater.
"May irritate eyes." -- On a can of self-defense pepper spray.
"Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." -- On a novelty rock garden set called "Popcorn Rock."
"Caution! Contents hot!" -- On a Domino's Pizza box.
"Caution: Hot beverages are hot!" -- On a coffee cup.
"Caution: Shoots rubber bands." -- On a product called "Rubber Band Shooter."
"Warning: May contain small parts." -- On a frisbee.
"Do not use orally." -- On a toilet bowl cleaning brush.
"Please keep out of children." -- On a butcher knife.
"Not suitable for children aged 36 months or less." -- On a birthday card for a 1 year old.
"Do not recharge, put in backwards, or use." -- On a battery.
"Warning: Do not use on eyes." -- In the manual for a heated seat cushion.
"Do not look into laser with remaining eye." -- On a laser pointer.
"Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.
"For use on animals only." -- On an electric cattle prod.
"For use by trained personnel only." -- On a can of air freshener.
"Keep out of reach of children and teenagers." -- On a can of air freshener.
"Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you." -- On a motorcycle helmet-mounted rear-view mirror.
"Warning: Riders of personal watercraft may suffer injury due to the forceful injection of water into body cavities either by falling into the water or while mounting the craft." -- In the manual for a jetski.
"Warning: Do not climb inside this bag and zip it up. Doing so will cause injury and death." -- A label inside a protective bag (for fragile objects), which measures 15cm by 15cm by 12cm.
"Do not use as ear plugs." -- On a package of silly putty.
"Please store in the cold section of the refrigerator." -- On a bag of fresh grapes in Australia.
"Warning: knives are sharp!" -- On the packaging of a sharpening stone.
"Not for weight control." -- On a pack of Breath Savers.
"Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth." -- On the label of a bottled drink.
"Theft of this container is a crime." -- On a milk crate.
"Do not use intimately." -- On a tube of deodorant.
"Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice." -- On a box of rat poison.
"Fragile. Do not drop." -- Posted on a Boeing 757.
"Cannot be made non-poisonous." -- On the back of a can of de-icing windshield fluid.
"Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage." -- On a portable stroller.
"Excessive dust may be irritating to shin and eyes." -- On a tube of agarose powder, used to make gels.
"Look before driving." -- On the dash board of a mail truck.
"Do not iron clothes on body." -- On packaging for a Rowenta iron.
"Do not drive car or operate machinery." -- On Boot's children's cough medicine.
"For indoor or outdoor use only." -- On a string of Christmas lights.
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." -- On a child sized Superman costume.
"This door is alarmed from 7:00pm - 7:00am." -- On a hospital's outside access door.
"Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted." -- On a sign at a railroad station.
"Warning: do not use if you have prostate problems." -- On a box of Midol PMS relief tablets.
"Product will be hot after heating." -- On a supermarket dessert box.
"Do not turn upside down." -- On the bottom of a supermarket dessert box.
"Do not light in face. Do not expose to flame." -- On a lighter.
"Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball." -- On the label for a cheap rubber ball toy.
"Not for human consumption." -- On a package of dice.
"May be harmful if swallowed." -- On a shipment of hammers.
"Using Ingenio cookware to destroy your old pots may void your warranty." -- A printed message that appears in a television advertisement when the presenter demonstrates how strong the cookware is by using it to beat up and destroy a regular frying pan.
"Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand." -- In the manual for a Swedish chainsaw.
"Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers." -- From a manual for an SGI computer.
"Warning: May contain nuts." -- On a package of peanuts.
"Do not eat." -- On a slip of paper in a stereo box, referring to the styrofoam packing.
"Do not eat if seal is missing." -- On said seal.
"Remove occupants from the stroller before folding it."
"Access hole only -- not intended for use in lifting box." -- On the sides of a shipping carton, just above cut-out openings which one would assume were handholds.
"Warning: May cause drowsiness." -- On a bottle of Nytol, a brand of sleeping pills.
"Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death." -- Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle.
"Do not use orally after using rectally." -- In the instructions for an electric thermometer.
"Turn off motor before using this product." -- On the packaging for a chain saw file, used to sharpen the cutting teeth on the chain.
"Not to be used as a personal flotation device." -- On a 6x10 inch inflatable picture frame.
"Do not put in mouth." -- On a box of bottle rockets.
"Remove plastic before eating." -- On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack.
"Not dishwasher safe." -- On a remote control for a TV.
"For lifting purposes only." -- On the box for a car jack.
"Do not put lit candles on phone." -- On the instructions for a cordless phone.
"Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants." -- On the packaging for a wristwatch.
"Do not wear for sumo wrestling." -- From a set of washing instructions. See a scanned image.
Assurances:

"Safe for use around pets." -- On a box of Arm & Hammer Cat Litter.
Small Print From Commercials:

"Do not use house paint on face." -- In a Visa commercial that depicts an expecting couple looking for paint at a hardware store.
"Do not drive cars in ocean." -- In a car commercial which shows a car in the ocean.
"Always drive on roads. Not on people." -- From a car commercial which shows a vehicle "body-surfing" at a concert.
"For a limited time only." -- From a Rally's commercial that described how their burgers were fresh.
Signs and Notices:

"No stopping or standing." -- A sign at bus stops everywhere.
"Do not sit under coconut trees." -- A sign on a coconut palm in a West Palm Beach park circa 1950.
"These rows reserved for parents with children." -- A sign in a church.
"All cups leaving this store, rather full or empty, must be paid for." -- A sign in a Cumberland Farms in Hillsboro, New Hampshire.
"Malfunction: Too less water." -- A notice left on a coffee machine.
"Prescriptions cannot be filled by phone." -- On a form in a clinic.
"You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." -- On a bag of Fritos.
"Fits one head." -- On a hotel-provided shower cap box.
"Payment is due by the due date." -- On a credit card statement.
"No small children." -- On a laundromat triple washer.
"Warning: Ramp Ends In Stairs." -- A sign, correctly describing the end of a concrete ramp intended for handicap access to a bridge.
Safety Procedures:

"Take care: new non-slip surface." -- On a sign in front of a newly renovated ramp that led to the entrance of a building.
"In case of flood, proceed uphill. In case of flash flood, proceed uphill quickly." -- One of the emergency safety procedures at a summer camp.
Ingredients:

"Ingredients: Artificially bleached flour, sugar, vegetable fat, yeast, salt, gluten, soya flour, emulsifier 472 (E) & 481, flour treatment agents, enzymes, water. May contain: fruit." -- The ingredients list on a package of fruit buns.
"100% pure yarn." -- On a sweater.
"Some materials may irritate sensitive skin. Please look at the materials if you believe this may be the case.
Materials:
Covering: 100% Unknown.
Stuffing: 100% Unknown."
-- On a pillow.
"Cleans and refreshes without soap or water. Contains: Water, fragrance & soap." -- On the packet for a moist towelette. See a scanned image.
Instructions:

"Remove the plastic wrapper." -- The first instruction on a bag of microwave popcorn; to see the instructions, one first has to remove the plastic wrapper and unfold the pouch.
"Take one capsule by mouth three times daily until gone." -- On a box of pills.
"Open packet. Eat contents." -- Instructions on a packet of airline peanuts.
"Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat." -- Instructions on the packaging for a muffin at a 7-11.
"Use like regular soap." -- On a bar of Dial soap.
"Instructions: usage known." -- Instructions on a can of black pepper.
"Serving suggestion: Defrost." -- On a Swann frozen dinner.
"Simply pour the biscuits into a bowl and allow the cat to eat when it wants." -- On a bag of cat biscuits.
"In order to get out of car, open door, get out, lock doors, and then close doors." -- In a car manual.
"Please include the proper portion of your bill." -- On the envelope for an auto insurance bill.
"The appliance is switched on by setting the on/off switch to the 'on' position." -- Instructions for an espresso kettle.
"For heat-retaining corrugated cardboard technology to function properly, close lid." -- On a Domino's sandwich box.

Something I've actually seen in real life is an oar that says 'Do not use to beat husband, wife, children, or pets.' So I'm guessing neighbors, friends, and random people are okay to beat with the oar? Awesome.		2011-11-04 05:59:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

I saw a sign outside an opticians which said: If you can't read this, you need your eyes tested.

True Story		2011-11-04 12:16:00

Author:
standby250
Posts: 1113

I read a book with some of these in, though the only one I can remember was a warning on a ready meal saying "Do not turn packaging upside-down". This was written on the bottom of the packaging 2011-11-04 16:45:00

Author:
kirbyman62
Posts: 1893

I've always found "No added sugar" to be somewhat deceptive. Maybe that's because I'm stupid.2011-11-04 22:23:00

Author:
Skeggers
Posts: 583

I have an iTunes voucher that has a lovely little message near the end of the Terms and Conditions that says "Don't steal music" xD2011-11-04 22:46:00

Author:
kirbyman62
Posts: 1893

It says somewhere in the Sony Terms & Conditions about not sending them a bomb in the post or something. Can't remember exactly what it said.2011-11-04 23:16:00

Author:
Skeggers
Posts: 583

It says somewhere in the Sony Terms & Conditions about not sending them a bomb in the post or something. Can't remember exactly what it said.

http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS7qINQAT-FJITvfW_A43Qfc2DiOKxjXSHA-mFn8wvFEaMV0OhylQ		2011-11-04 23:41:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

I just remembered I was making some popcorn in the microwave once. The popcorn was in a paper bag within an opaque plastic bag, with a warning on the inner paper bag saying not to forget to take the plastic wrapping off.

I hope that made sense, I've only just woken up		2011-11-04 23:57:00

Author:
SR20DETDOG
Posts: 2431

I just remembered I was making some popcorn in the microwave once. The popcorn was in a paper bag within an opaque plastic bag, with a warning on the inner paper bag saying not to forget to take the plastic wrapping off.

I hope that made sense, I've only just woken up
Would it be less dumb if I said that I had once forgotten to take the plastic bag before putting it into the microwave? :blush:		2011-11-05 00:18:00

Author:
gdn001
Posts: 5891

Extra flavor.2011-11-05 00:49:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

Found on a box of baking soda. Left side of box-directions on use as an antacid.
Right side of box-If swallowed , get medical help or contact Poison Control Center right away.
??? So how do you use as an antacid without swallowing???		2011-11-05 00:57:00

Author:
Lady_Luck__777
Posts: 3458

On a small carton of Innocent Smoothie saying, above the hole for a straw to be poked through, "Insert Earphones.". I truly wonder how many dumb-*sses have fallen for that one. 2011-11-05 01:24:00

Author:
abyssalassassin
Posts: 717

It says somewhere in the Sony Terms & Conditions about not sending them a bomb in the post or something. Can't remember exactly what it said.


e. Uploading, posting streaming or transmitting any content that contains any viruses, worms, spyware, time bombs or other computer programs that may damage, interfere with or disrupt the Sites or computers or other users;

Found it (http://us.playstation.com/support/termsofuse/)... I don't think they meant physical bombs...		2011-11-05 01:38:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

I saw a bomb threat report form a while back, but couldn't find it again. Anyway, I found this similar one on the internet:

http://img.docstoccdn.com/thumb/orig/10747451.png

I have to say, the "What is your name?" and "What is your address?" are two of the stupidest questions you could possibly ask to a person who, if caught, will most likely spend the remainder of their life in jail.

EDIT: Thought of something else. Cigarette lighters usually have a message saying "Light away from face." on them - but how else are you meant to actually light a cigarette which, obviously, would be in your mouth, and therefore near your face?		2011-11-05 03:23:00

Author:
standby250
Posts: 1113

Found it (http://us.playstation.com/support/termsofuse/)... I don't think they meant physical bombs...

That means it's ok to send them a real bomb! *nods*		2011-11-05 03:37:00

Author:
Macnme
Posts: 1970

That means it's ok to send them a real bomb! *nods*

Yea. You want to buy it? Or should I?		2011-11-05 05:34:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

That means it's ok to send them a real bomb! *nods*

It's also okay to send them bombs if you don't agree to the Terms & Conditions.		2011-11-05 06:26:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

There's a "Do not eat" label on one of my hammers.2011-11-05 07:33:00

Author:
Outlaw-Jack
Posts: 5757

There's a "Do not eat" label on one of my hammers.
Hmm...I think the reason they put stupid labels like "Do not eat" on objects no one could even fit in their mouth is because there might have been some idiot dumb enough to try it. :o		2011-11-05 08:47:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

Hmm...I think the reason they put stupid labels like "Do not eat" on objects no one could even fit in their mouth is because there might have been some idiot dumb enough to try it. :o

Do you know this from personal experiences? ZING!
JK! Calm down.
So anyways... I was at this weird Fair thing my school does and I won this thing that shoots rubber bands and it was like Caution: Shoots Rubber bands. Thanks, I didn't know that from the name of the product and the illustrations on the package...		2011-11-05 10:47:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

On a box of cotton buds: "Do not insert into earholes or nostrils"

So what is is supposed to be used on?		2011-11-05 10:58:00

Author:
SnipySev
Posts: 2452

... I don't think they meant physical bombs...
Ah, I must've not read it properly in true style. Thought it was a bit odd.

It's always funny reading "Suitable for vegetarians" on the back of a packet of salad, too.		2011-11-05 11:11:00

Author:
Skeggers
Posts: 583

I think I remember reading on a label on a bottle of water that said something like "You may not refill this bottle" 2011-11-05 16:09:00

Author:
kirbyman62
Posts: 1893

I think I remember reading on a label on a bottle of water that said something like "You may not refill this bottle"

Don't. Weird Al will sue you.		2011-11-05 21:57:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

On the tag of a blanket one of my foster brothers has:
"DO NOT - UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES - USE AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO"
So, if a earthquake ever hits here, I'll grab the blanket, since it says nothing about earthquakes. 		2011-11-06 04:45:00

Author:
jalr2d2
Posts: 256

Refrigerate after opening. So I am not allowed to drink it?2011-11-06 08:32:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

Refrigerate after opening. So I am not allowed to drink it?

That's just silly, of course you can, it just means you have to be in the fridge while drinking it.		2011-11-06 11:40:00

Author:
SR20DETDOG
Posts: 2431

An egg container that says "contains egg"2011-11-06 19:19:00

Author:
lark98-2
Posts: 116

A bottle of HOTsauce in my fridge.
"Caution: hot"		2011-11-06 19:46:00

Author:
Maxi
Posts: 1176

That's just silly, of course you can, it just means you have to be in the fridge while drinking it.

Wow! Thanks! Now I know how to properly enjoy my drinks without some lawsuit-happy psychos.		2011-11-06 20:31:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

Wow! Thanks! Now I know how to properly enjoy my drinks without some lawsuit-happy psychos.
One of my biggest childhood fears was ripping off the tag on a pillow. It said that under no circumstances may an individual rip off the tag (besides the consumer).
I was little. I thought they meant I had to eat the pillow in order to rip the tag off.
It just made it worse when I watched a cartoon in which the character tore the tag and the world exploded. >.>		2011-11-06 20:55:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

One of my biggest childhood fears was ripping off the tag on a pillow. It said that under no circumstances may an individual rip off the tag (besides the consumer).
I was little. I thought they meant I had to eat the pillow in order to rip the tag off.
It just made it worse when I watched a cartoon in which the character tore the tag and the world exploded. >.>

LOL! I always bragged to my friends when I ripped a tag off. I was also young.		2011-11-06 20:59:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

LOL! I always bragged to my friends when I ripped a tag off. I was also young.
Lucky. The first time I did it I ate the tag. Again, I wasn't sure what 'consumer' meant.		2011-11-06 21:07:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

Not getting why Sackpapoi is thanking every post in this thread >:I
Anyway, you know those packets of Silica Gel that always say "Do not eat"? That's just so much temptation to a 5 year old.
Managed to avoid it though. Thankfully.		2011-11-06 22:09:00

Author:
Skeggers
Posts: 583

Tresspassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.2011-11-06 22:54:00

Author:
junk-Warrior7
Posts: 276

Not getting why Sackpapoi is thanking every post in this thread >:I

maybe because he's the OP and he's thanking people for posting in his thread. :/
I don't get why you make the angry face. Is it somehow hurting you that he is thanking everyone?		2011-11-06 23:02:00

Author:
biorogue
Posts: 8424

i saw on a mop label warning may slip.
then i seen something that said on a fire extinguisher WARNING MAY BE HOT
XD		2011-11-06 23:11:00

Author:
killerbrainbow
Posts: 7

maybe because he's the OP and he's thanking people for posting in his thread. :/
I don't get why you make the angry face. Is it somehow hurting you that he is thanking everyone?
No, just seems to be abusing the rep system a little.
Also, it isn't an angry face. >:U is an angry face.		2011-11-06 23:25:00

Author:
Skeggers
Posts: 583

Tresspassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.

My brother put that on the door to his room.		2011-11-07 01:34:00

Author:
alaskadawn
Posts: 101

No, just seems to be abusing the rep system a little.
Also, it isn't an angry face. >:U is an angry face.
Well, if that's the way you see it, I'll stop. I wouldn't call it "abusing the rep system" though, as the thanks button doesn't really do anything but...show up under your post >.>.		2011-11-07 07:11:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

No, just seems to be abusing the rep system a little.
Also, it isn't an angry face. >:U is an angry face.

Maybe put a tag on this thread?
"Warning, posting in this thread may result in getting your posts thanked."		2011-11-07 07:22:00

Author:
nysudyrgh
Posts: 5482

On a jar of peanut butter: DOESNT CONTAIN JELLY...2011-11-07 22:49:00

Author:
DominationMags
Posts: 1840

My favorite saying:


Is there life after death? Trespass here and find out.

Saw this outside the propane plant thingy near my house...		2011-11-11 20:34:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

Hmmmm... Bump deserves double post? :o

From Etsy...

http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=38003
http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=38004

Small pictures are small... I don't know how to make them bigger... Sorry... D:		2011-12-08 07:35:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

I once bought a bottle of cheap paint and it said and im not joking "do not insert into anus"2011-12-08 18:53:00

Author:
butter-kicker
Posts: 1061

I find it funny when labels say "Source of Fibre".
I'm sure that dead bug on the ground is also a "Source of Fibre", but they don't go bragging about it.
2011-12-09 21:04:00

Author:
midnight_heist
Posts: 2513

I find it funny when labels say "Source of Fibre".
I'm sure that dead bug on the ground is also a "Source of Fibre", but they don't go bragging about it.

You mean like bananas? I enjoy bananas.		2011-12-09 22:59:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

http://memearchive.net/memerial.net/2764/may-contain-watermelon.jpg
ORLY?		2011-12-17 05:59:00

Author:
ALEXhatena
Posts: 1110

You mean like bananas? I enjoy bananas.


Oh I'm sure you do. *wink*		2011-12-17 13:31:00

Author:
RakasaPlus
Posts: 136

Oh I'm sure you do. *wink*
http://s3.amazonaws.com/kym-assets/entries/icons/original/000/000/472/seriouscatcover.jpg?1260046843		2011-12-17 15:24:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

There was this perfume advertised on the internet: It was by David Beckham. in the small font in the corner of the packaging it reads, and I quote


"You do not recieve David Beckham with this product".


....After a stunned, confused silence, it was like.... well....LOL.		2011-12-24 19:41:00

Author:
SockFace
Posts: 190

well this is something. I promise not to use Itunes to develop nuclear technology! Now gimme my song!

https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-zTt5c96bjGA/TxBqu2ZBPlI/AAAAAAAABMg/ghtvOh93hlQ/s500/job-fails-i-really-need-to-start-reading-my-itunes-agreement.jpg		2012-01-13 17:41:00

Author:
biorogue
Posts: 8424

well this is something. I promise not to use Itunes to develop nuclear technology! Now gimme my song!
This is serious. It's totally possible that some guy can bomb a whole nation with their Ipod! They've mass produced them to create the BIGGEST explosion on the face of the Earth! I, of course, shall not get bombed. I don't have an Ipod .

...why.		2012-01-13 18:54:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

This is serious. It's totally possible that some guy can bomb a whole nation with their Ipod! They've mass produced them to create the BIGGEST explosion on the face of the Earth! I, of course, shall not get bombed. I don't have an Ipod .

...why.

Well, if it's on your iPhone, it's definitely illegal. Any GPS enabled device shuts down after it reaches a certain speed. Otherwise, it can be used to guide missiles. I definitely didn't learn that from firsthand experience... 		2012-01-14 00:14:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

I saw a pointless sign that says" do not touch sharp edges"
It's all the sign says.		2012-01-15 04:42:00

Author:
majormel84
Posts: 398

Hmm... Dumbest thing ever...

Anybody for hacked site!? 		2012-01-15 07:27:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

I saw this on a forum mainpage:


Hello, mister CC, it seems you ignored my email? so if you want to re-think my offer how about you give me an email? aosdana000@gmail.com, thanks very much!		2012-01-15 09:43:00

Author:
nysudyrgh
Posts: 5482

I saw this on a forum mainpage:

It's funny... I swear I said that 2 hours prior to you... >.>		2012-01-16 03:45:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

****, I missed your post, CURSE YOU NUT!!!1 :kz: :AngrySmiley: :AnotherAngrySmiley:2012-01-16 15:40:00

Author:
nysudyrgh
Posts: 5482

****, I missed your post, CURSE YOU NUT!!!1 :kz: :AngrySmiley: :AnotherAngrySmiley:

/trollface



Get sniped by 2 hours!

Oh and I found this...

Wait for it...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7ssVT6T3mQ&feature=related		2012-01-16 16:31:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7ssVT6T3mQ&feature=related
OMG! This was more like an alien cat! This one scares even me! 0_0		2012-01-18 23:19:00

Author:
Schark94
Posts: 3378

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7ssVT6T3mQ&feature=related
That's how you get scared the boss way. Walk away casually.		2012-01-19 15:33:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

This is serious. It's totally possible that some guy can bomb a whole nation with their Ipod! They've mass produced them to create the BIGGEST explosion on the face of the Earth! I, of course, shall not get bombed. I don't have an Ipod .

...why.

Want to create the BIGGEST explosion on the face of the Earth?

There's an app for that!

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ldp3jukzHo1qb9a2wo1_500.png		2012-01-19 16:08:00

Author:
Ali_Star
Posts: 4085

Stupid (http://stupidest.com/)

http://stupidest.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/buy-3.jpg

-_-

http://stupidest.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/MLK-loofah.jpg

-____-

http://stupidest.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/google-toilet-paper-thailand.jpg

-________-		2012-01-19 17:05:00

Author:
comishguy67
Posts: 849

http://cheezpictureisunrelated.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/wtf-photos-videos-handerpants.jpg
We don't want them getting cold.
What? What are GLOVES?		2012-01-19 21:06:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

Even on our own beloved site:
Your date of birth and age are displayed in several places on the forum. Only the administrator will have access to your date of birth should you choose to hide it via the privacy option below. Please contact the Administrator if your date of birth has changed.		2012-01-19 23:49:00

Author:
Lady_Luck__777
Posts: 3458

Even on our own beloved site:
Your date of birth and age are displayed in several places on the forum. Only the administrator will have access to your date of birth should you choose to hide it via the privacy option below. Please contact the Administrator if your date of birth has changed.

I take it you've never been baptized?		2012-01-20 03:44:00

Author:
comishguy67
Posts: 849

You assume wrong.2012-01-20 03:52:00

Author:
Lady_Luck__777
Posts: 3458

You assume wrong.

I assume you didn't get the joke?		2012-01-20 04:03:00

Author:
comishguy67
Posts: 849

I understood what you were saying.
Just didn't see how it related to the thread.
Dumbest....Thing....Ever		2012-01-20 04:08:00

Author:
Lady_Luck__777
Posts: 3458

I understood what you were saying.
Just didn't see how it related to the thread.
Dumbest....Thing....Ever

What...?

I was talking about how you said you thought it was dumb for LBPC to have policy about changing birthdays.

The joke was that when you become baptized, at least from what I learned from chruch, you become a "born again" christian...

Get it now?



Edit: Well...it was a pretty stupid joke! 		2012-01-20 04:14:00

Author:
comishguy67
Posts: 849

What...?

I was talking about how you said you thought it was dumb for LBPC to have policy about changing birthdays.

The joke was that when you become baptized, at least from what I learned from chruch, you become a "born again" christian...

Get it now?



Edit: Well...it was a pretty stupid joke!

Wait so I can get my birth year changed to what it's supposed to be...? I'm tired of being 22 on here... I feel more like a... 43? Maybe 17... Not sure... I'll get back to you on that.

Anyways:

All Men Named David Nelson are Terrorists

Just Another Day In Line:

You probably know that all airline passenger lists are compared against a no-fly list, which the TSA didn't even want to admit existed at one time. The problem is that, as it turns out, sometimes more than one person in the world shares the same name.

Uh-Oh:

So, you can imagine the chaos that erupted when a "David Nelson" somehow wound up on the list. That name isn't exactly as distinctive as, say, Flavor Flav, so the result was many, many David Nelsons getting pulled out of line every single time they flew (including one David Nelson who got called out by security four times on one trip).

It doesn't help that the process to get your name removed from the watch list takes at least a month and a half, and the ACLU had to sue to even get that. In a nice touch of irony, one of the lawyers who was working for the ACLU was named...David Nelson.

To Make Things Worse...

An easier way to get off the no-fly list is to just change your name, as one Canadian man did. Yes, the entire no-fly list is founded on the idea that terrorists are stupid enough to fly using their own names.		2012-01-21 08:16:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

Soooooo, I guess we're going back to this phone now?

https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-IhRMaXguByA/Tx24To6SGdI/AAAAAAAABN0/wpBe24PtHxE/s512/TrGyr.jpg

that's almost as bad as this
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-S8aPyszFxg0/Tx26jBj4ChI/AAAAAAAABOE/ik5oQPbIQUk/s640/cell_phone_free_hands_free_kit_weedoom.com_.jpg		2012-01-23 19:53:00

Author:
biorogue
Posts: 8424

Soooooo, I guess we're going back to this phone now?

https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-IhRMaXguByA/Tx24To6SGdI/AAAAAAAABN0/wpBe24PtHxE/s512/TrGyr.jpg

that's almost as bad as this
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-S8aPyszFxg0/Tx26jBj4ChI/AAAAAAAABOE/ik5oQPbIQUk/s640/cell_phone_free_hands_free_kit_weedoom.com_.jpg

There's a company that produces and tries to make profit out of these? Good god.		2012-01-24 21:51:00

Author:
kirbyman62
Posts: 1893

Soooooo, I guess we're going back to this phone now?

https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-IhRMaXguByA/Tx24To6SGdI/AAAAAAAABN0/wpBe24PtHxE/s512/TrGyr.jpg

that's almost as bad as this
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-S8aPyszFxg0/Tx26jBj4ChI/AAAAAAAABOE/ik5oQPbIQUk/s640/cell_phone_free_hands_free_kit_weedoom.com_.jpg

As stupid as that is, it's funny how it says "Cellphone KIT".. Uh-huh, so that used rubber band that I could just go get off of Broccoli is now being sold in packs because it's a kit....		2012-01-24 22:34:00

Author:
Unknown User

http://canv.as/ugc/processed/4aefe4c324b2b2c85354335a5f089fd740d17093.png

Well he seems to not like Vista...		2012-01-24 22:57:00

Author:
Schark94
Posts: 3378

speaking of showers... i was once in a swimming pool shower and the floor has a warning engraved in it saying: slippery when wet
really floor?! i would never of guessed you would be slippery after shampoo and soap have been on you!!! derp herp.

other signs include

do not drink - on a bottle of bleach
do not swallow - on a golf ball
warning strong adeshive! - on superglue
do not microwave while worn - on a thermal hand warmer
do not submerge - on a toaster		2012-02-01 12:39:00

Author:
Arastoph
Posts: 216

speaking of showers... i was once in a swimming pool shower and the floor has a warning engraved in it saying: slippery when wet
really floor?! i would never of guessed you would be slippery after shampoo and soap have been on you!!! derp herp.

other signs include

do not drink - on a bottle of bleach
do not swallow - on a golf ball
warning strong adeshive! - on superglue
do not microwave while worn - on a thermal hand warmer
do not submerge - on a toaster

What you need to understand, is that people are idiots. They'll do all those things unless you tell them not to! Like all those stunts on TV where it says "don't try this at home". No, Mr TV..... I'm not gonna try to rocketboard down a big ramp, jumping over flamethrower-wielding elephants, with a bomb attached to my private parts..... but thanks for the warning anyway.		2012-02-01 13:27:00

Author:
Ali_Star
Posts: 4085

What you need to understand, is that people are idiots. They'll do all those things unless you tell them not to! Like all those stunts on TV where it says "don't try this at home". No, Mr TV..... I'm not gonna try to rocketboard down a big ramp, jumping over flamethrower-wielding elephants, with a bomb attached to my private parts..... but thanks for the warning anyway.
It's more because if someone still does something like that and tries to sue whatever, they can defend themselves by saying: "Well, we told you not to do that!"		2012-02-01 13:48:00

Author:
gdn001
Posts: 5891

It's more because if someone still does something like that and tries to sue whatever, they can defend themselves by saying: "Well, we told you not to do that!"

True.

In ten years, they'll be using warnings like:

"Do not put in eye" on kitchen knives.

Just to protect themselves from the ever-growing number of idiots in the world...... I blame the internet. 		2012-02-01 13:56:00

Author:
Ali_Star
Posts: 4085

It's more because if someone still does something like that and tries to sue whatever, they can defend themselves by saying: "Well, we told you not to do that!"
"You can't sue me! I put a warning sign on that lemon."		2012-02-01 19:24:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

there is already a thread of this. telling you this to warn you about thread being blocked by "someone" i know. happened to me several days ago...2012-02-12 01:54:00

Author:
Sunbunny23
Posts: 995

True.

In ten years, they'll be using warnings like:

"Do not put in eye" on kitchen knives.

Just to protect themselves from the ever-growing number of idiots in the world...... I blame the internet.

"Do not touch while hot" on a toaster...		2012-02-14 17:02:00

Author:
ALEXhatena
Posts: 1110

there is already a thread of this. telling you this to warn you about thread being blocked by "someone" i know. happened to me several days ago...
Uh, I don't see one. If you're talking about "What Stupid Things Have You Done?", then that's on a whole different topic than this one. If there IS, however, then it's probably so old that it doesn't matter anymore, or came after mine. I made this thread on November 2nd, 2011. If you've seen one reasonably older than this that is still a bit active, then you've got one. If not, I wouldn't worry about it. This was made a long while ago, and if there was a problem, don't you kinda think it would be blocked by now? Also, it's not a huge deal if someone blocks a duplicate thread. It's only preventing complications and is nothing personal. 		2012-02-15 17:27:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195

my little brother has a 125 honda dirt bike, and under the back finder it says "do not eat"

what has happened to our earth!!		2012-02-18 23:46:00

Author:
Kaboosh99
Posts: 359

what has happened to our earth!!

I'm glad the warning is there. If it wasn't, I would have about 10 pounds of plastic inside of me. Do you wish that upon me? Do you really want me to go through surgery to have the plastic removed? I don't even know you! Why do you want me to writhe in pain?!

YOU DON'T KNOW ME!		2012-02-21 04:20:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

I'm glad the warning is there. If it wasn't, I would have about 10 pounds of plastic inside of me. Do you wish that upon me? Do you really want me to go through surgery to have the plastic removed? I don't even know you! Why do you want me to writhe in pain?!

YOU DON'T KNOW ME!

Or do we...? 		2012-02-21 05:08:00

Author:
DominationMags
Posts: 1840

Or do we...?

Two words.

Winky. Face.

2012-02-22 03:45:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

I remember there was microwave oven with label that says do not put live cats inside. OMG...so putting dogs is ok.. :-DDD2012-02-22 09:43:00

Author:
Unexpecter
Posts: 137

On a cup at Ikea

"Is not meant for Watermelons."
http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/000/151/n725075089_288918_2774.jpg		2012-02-22 15:28:00

Author:
DominationMags
Posts: 1840

Well, today I was eating breakfast next to the window when a pigeon flew into it and scared me half to death. It hit it so hard it left a mark.

http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l37/Corporeal/0532a6b0.jpg

I'm not sure you can really see it in this photo, but even the leading edge of its wings were visible on the glass.		2012-02-22 15:43:00

Author:
Ayneh
Posts: 2454

In one of the dorms here on campus, there is one of those emergency fire escape doors that sound the alarm and it leads to the INSIDE of the building2012-02-22 21:59:00

Author:
damaz10
Posts: 771

In one of the dorms here on campus, there is one of those emergency fire escape doors that sound the alarm and it leads to the INSIDE of the building
Either who made that is dumb, or disturbingly clever...		2012-02-22 23:39:00

Author:
gdn001
Posts: 5891

I have a pack of playing cards which says "WARNING: Choking hazard. Not for children 15 years and under"

I don't know what's stupider; the fact that 15 year olds would try to eat playing cards or the fact that these are Sonic the Hedgehog playing cards, thus their primary target would be well under 15.		2012-02-23 14:06:00

Author:
Vector-Espio-Fan
Posts: 119

Well, today I was eating breakfast next to the window when a pigeon flew into it and scared me half to death. It hit it so hard it left a mark.

http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l37/Corporeal/0532a6b0.jpg

I'm not sure you can really see it in this photo, but even the leading edge of its wings were visible on the glass.

You're house looks beautiful. Great exterior design! 		2012-02-24 00:43:00

Author:
Speedynutty68
Posts: 1614

http://funnyphotosto.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/16/a-sign-that-explains-itself.jpg

...

....

No Comment...		2012-03-13 03:04:00

Author:
Wolffy123
Posts: 406

http://9thcivic.com/gallery/albums/post/stupid_signs.jpg

... Sorry, I saw this one too and I just had to post it....

...

Wow. 		2012-03-13 03:07:00

Author:
Wolffy123
Posts: 406

For anyone wondering why any of these warnings need to be said, I present The Darwin Awards (http://www.darwinawards.com/).2012-03-13 19:40:00

Author:
Super_Dork_42
Posts: 1874

http://desmond.imageshack.us/Himg832/scaled.php?server=832&filename=c911e1d71bc041c18e90b4a.jpg&res=medium

Hmm.		2012-03-13 21:02:00

Author:
Oddmania
Posts: 1305

I once ate Mexican Tortillas...
...Made in China...		2012-03-14 20:30:00

Author:
TradeMarkSG
Posts: 65

apparently adults who aren't apart of the system throw free stuff on the ground in slow motion


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAYL5H46QnQ		2012-03-15 07:19:00

Author:
comishguy67
Posts: 849

This has been one of my favorites for a long time. NOT photoshopped:


http://i900.photobucket.com/albums/ac207/tross13/Fark/Causalityloop.jpg		2012-03-15 08:49:00

Author:
Taffey
Posts: 3187

Some of you have probably seen this before, but this is a first for me.
I have a jar of peanuts at my house. It says "PEANUTS" in big, bold, white letters in the front. Under it, it shows a huge pile of peanuts. The jar is, you guessed it, translucent, so you can see ALL of the peanuts in it. I turn the jar around. On the back, it says "Allergen Statement: Contains peanuts".
FAIL.
I just wanted to put that out there. So yeah. Have you seen anything completely stupid lately? You know, just things that would normally take common sense to figure out.

Well as obvious as it is, it now has to be clearly labelled on the product for people's safety

I once heard a story where an old lady back in around the 80's went into Macdonalds for a cup of coffee. When the man at the counter gave the coffee to her he said to her clearly that it WILL be hot, but when she did she burnt her lip and got extremely angry. The next day Macdonalds got sued by the old lady because it did not say 'Caution: Hot' on the coffee cup!

Tens of people saved from scalds now thanks to her. 		2012-03-15 16:52:00

Author:
Denim360
Posts: 482

Well as obvious as it is, it now has to be clearly labelled on the product for people's safety

I once heard a story where an old lady back in around the 80's went into Macdonalds for a cup of coffee. When the man at the counter gave the coffee to her he said to her clearly that it WILL be hot, but when she did she burnt her lip and got extremely angry. The next day Macdonalds got sued by the old lady because it did not say 'Caution: Hot' on the coffee cup!


Tens of people saved from scalds now thanks to her.
I think someone already posted that. 		2012-03-17 09:46:00

Author:
Sackpapoi
Posts: 1195


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