Archive: 24 posts

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The Factory MovementPhireballMS The Factory - An Old, Abandoned Factory Located Deep Underground. After So Many Years Of Being Unused, The Factory Is In A State Of Dire Disrepair. The Perfect Place For Sackboy To Explore! Run Through A Detailed Factory Based Environment, With Various Styles Of Gameplay. PICS: http://i1043.photobucket.com/albums/b434/MikehSkeggers/TheFactoryMovement-Wheel.jpg http://i1043.photobucket.com/albums/b434/MikehSkeggers/TheFactoryMovement-TightCorridor.jpg The Factory Movement Is An Atmospheric And Detailed Level, In Which You Will Be Jumping, Climbing And Grabbing Your Way Through Plenty Of Obstacles

2010-04-18 16:27:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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Looks pretty cool. I'll add this to my list.

2010-04-18 18:12:00 Author: qrtda235566 Posts: 3664

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Just played this! Great level! It looked alot like a factory, so top marks there! The gameplay was great, although it wasn't very original. I loved the "Get through you fatty" part! Some people might be a little offended though... I had a feeling that the level was gonna be quite short from seeing your design techniques, and it was short. I'm not very thermo-savvy, but I think you maxed out the complex shapes thermo. You had alot of complex shapes layered on top of eachother which increases the thermo level significantly. You could achieve the same affect by using the thin layer too add detail too, by cutting down the number of corners in the thick layer. I gave the level :star::star::star::star: and a heart! I'd appreciate it if you could give my level some feedback! It's called "Power of the Planet" (The link is in my sig).

2010-04-18 19:23:00 Author: Rhys125 Posts: 841

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Thanks for the feedback ^^ I'll go and check out Power of the Planet now :3

2010-04-18 19:31:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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I just played this, and it looks really good. There are epic amounts of detail in this level, and the gameplay is just straight fun. This seems like it would fit in as one of the two or three actually good levels on Cool Levels just because of the fun nature of the gameplay. It doesn't get complicated with a story or anything, it's just a fun run through a factory. I really liked it. The only, small complaint I have is at certain parts, there's a wall, but somewhere in the wall, there will be a gap in between the first and third fat layers for you to go through, though this gap isn't always noticeable. Perhaps you could add an arrow or something to make it easier to spot. Anyway, this was a great level, and I'm looking forward to what else you'll create. 4 stars and hearted. When you get the time, could you play my level? The link is in my sig.

2010-04-19 17:28:00 Author: qrtda235566 Posts: 3664

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Awesome, Thanks for the feedback. Annoyingly, this whole level has so many different pieces, that whenever I try to edit something, It lags so much x3 I'll try to add arrows, But I don't even think I can add any more stickers without it overheating x3 Checking out your level now ^^

2010-04-19 19:52:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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Bad: -Nothing special -Atmosphere Good: +Some parts of gameplay +Visuals Critic: It could have been better with few different type of obstacles and little bit more length. Try to imagine obstacles that really fit the factory theme!

2010-04-20 12:48:00 Author: FreeAim Posts: 2462

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I'll keep the criticism in mind for if I'm ever to make a sequel or something. The thermometor's too hot too make any more changes x3

2010-04-20 16:52:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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Hey Skeggers, I tried this one out today. I had fun! I think you did a pretty good job on everything. Your visuals are nice, and it has solid gameplay. I just want to mention that I wasn't too fond of the (doorway?) things you go through every so often. I just think they get in the way a little. I also think some colored lighting could really spruce this up. All in all nice level. Good work! Could you give me feedback on my LBP Paint Factory? Thanks

2010-04-21 01:42:00 Author: smasher Posts: 641

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I'll keep the criticism in mind for if I'm ever to make a sequel or something. The thermometor's too hot too make any more changes x3 You should watch Mm:s ''How to keep thermometer low'' video. Don't forget F4F

2010-04-21 14:43:00 Author: FreeAim Posts: 2462

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Yeah, I haven't been able to get to LBP today, So I'll check them all out tomorrow ^^

2010-04-21 21:57:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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Looks like fun, I'll play this.

2010-04-21 22:59:00 Author: X-FROGBOY-X Posts: 1800

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Cool, The more, the merrier :3 EDIT: Added new coloured lighting and Drastically reduced the number of Global lighting changes and music changes. Also deleted a couple of the doors and rounded a few edges.

2010-04-22 19:21:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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Updated with even moar stuff :3

2010-04-22 21:58:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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I liked it alot not much to say except the water at the end was unnecessary other than that nice level 4**** well you could try to incorporate the water into the level like an uder water maze or something to see an idea check out mu crystal cave 2 a very hard challenge ending in an electric underwater maze

2010-04-24 01:22:00 Author: Grunge Posts: 14

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Ok.... This has a great, factory-like atmosphere, so the visuals were mostly good, just in a few spots u reaallly went overboard with the little squares and stuff on the walls, like in the debris part.... Anyway, Issues -At the start, the camera is tilted, and you can see the rockets... That just kinda ruins it... lol -There was that one part, not far from the start, where there was just a random block of electric... just kinda wierd -Most of the challenges are one's we've seen before, Not that that's Reeeeaaallly bad, it's just, eh not anything new Great stuff -Idk why but I REALLY liked the score bubbles at the start. They were placed Greatly!! (The ones underground) never mind that, I liked all the scorebubbles... -i liked the funny dialogue -I did enjoy it can u play my Color Gardens and give feedback? Thanks Man

2010-04-24 04:30:00 Author: Shhabbazz Posts: 746

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I played this earlier, here's a review. GAMEPLAY OK, I would say that the gameplay is the best part of the level overall. Most of it was classic gameplay but it was still fun. It had a whole bunch of obstacles where you could get squished, which I like. Also, I liked all the secret-point areas that you put out throughout the level. VISUALS The visuals were also great in this level, you gave it a rusty, dirty feel that really brought me into the level. The lighting was also just right, too. The rockets made the level feel like you were walking through an actual factory. Overall, this is a good level with plenty of great gameplay. Great work Skeggers. :star::star::star::star::star:

2010-04-24 15:21:00 Author: X-FROGBOY-X Posts: 1800

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Greetings, Skeggers; Overall, I thought the level was an enjoyable experience, with a well established 'industrial' atmosphere and theme. The score-bubbles-behind-storage-cages made it fun to backtrack and explore a bit, rather than just blast on through. Below are a few thoughts and suggestions, meant to be constructive in nature (either for this level or your next) General comments: -- The factory felt very "tight" and cramped, game-play wise and visually, a bit monotonous, and only rarely changed in dimensions as you went. Real industrial areas *vary* tremendously, from small offices, to medium-sized shops, to *huge* factory floors, back to smaller storage areas, then outdoors to loading dock areas, up to rooftops with air circulation units and exhaust vents....you get the idea. You can take advantage of this variety in level building, and avoid the "more of the same" feel. -- The fogginess and lighting was a bit monotonous as well, and some variety would have been nice to see. Too much fog 'washes out' the entire level. Also, varying the fog can add to desired changes in atmosphere: such as moving from a busy, factory floor (with fog), to a quieter, storage area (no fog) --> "Whew! I made it through that and can see again!" <checkpoint>. Then back to the intensity again.... -- As others have said, the doorways are often "hidden" due to the camera view while playing (frustrating in places, even with the pink arrows now). I would actually recommend cutting-out the material which blocks the player's view as they pass through a doorway. We all know that LBP is an "ant-farm" platformer, with scenes often viewed in cross-section, so only having half a doorway there (such that the player can see themselves as they go through, is alright. -- The level had no real buildup in intensity, and no climax, that I could tell. It was just sort of platform, platform, platform....end. A good story, music piece, or gaming level generally builds up in intensity as you go, with some "dramatic" close to the action...a climax. (an area that I still struggle with in my own level building). -- The level had no story or goal: some reason for you to be there, something that needed to be accomplished. Having *something* as a reason for Sackboy/Sackgirl to brave the dangers of your level is a great way to build upon the theme and atmosphere you have worked hard to establish (Even something as weak as "What's wrong the the buffalo..." ) Specific comments: -- The "H4H Sucks" sign was distracting and out-of-theme, particularly since it appears at the very beginning of the level. Remember that the player's first impressions, upon entering the level, are *very* important in them deciding whether or not they will continue on: use your entry point for firmly establishing your theme and atmosphere, and entice the player to continue on. You might shift statements like this to the END of the level, at the score-board. -- The second speech bubble that appears, the one that tells you about the yellow LED areas, does not stay up long enough to read. It closes automatically, and too fast. -- The rockets which provide the smoke are often visible, especially in that opening scene, and ought to be hidden. -- The elastic-mounted (rubber banding) spotlights are a bit distracting. Mounting them on stiff rods hanging from the ceiling would have been more factory-like. Or, since you want the player to actually swing on them at one point, perhaps string would work better. -- I found the "shove on through, fatty" hint to be a little rude and unnecessary. It's an *abandoned* factory, right? -- Begging for Hearts and 5 Stars at the end is, to me, bad form, as well as contradictory to your "H4H Sucks" sentiment. Folks will rate it what they rate it: all you can do is try to present them with an enjoyable and unique experience. I think that you have a lot of potential as a level-builder, particularly in the area of creating feel and atmosphere, as well as basic game-play. You have the basic elements in place: now it's a matter of organizing and orchestrating them into a "story." -- Nanluin

2010-04-24 16:45:00 Author: Nanluin Posts: 98

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Nice factory level. Has a cool set of obstacles and platforming and "incredible" music. The lighting needs to be more clear and the rockets on a ceiling are visible.

2010-04-24 17:18:00 Author: JustinArt Posts: 1314

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Thanks to you guys for the criticism, and especially to Nanluin for giving me loads to focus on and fix when I come to the next level ^^. As a starting note, I did try at one point adding a storyline, but it just seemed tacked on and didn't really fit anything, so I got rid of it. Anyone that played the level at that time will probably remember it not working. The doors are something I've been trying to get right since the whole thread began, I've gotten rid of a few and added stickers and such, but I can't seem to get it just right. If I delete all the doors, I found I didn't quite get the whole feeling of sections in the level, and they do help to divide things up, even if it's just a little. So, yeah, still trying to right that one. I placed the Anti-H4H sitcker there so that people knew from the beginning that I wasn't prepared to go doing H4H with anyone. Also, If I put it at the end of the level, there is a chance that people mightn't reach it and wouldn't then notice the message, So I can't really think of a solution to that problem... I have no idea why that speech bubble is disappearing so quickly, I'll try to get to the root of the problem, and sort it out The rockets which provide smoke can't be visible too often, because they only appear right at the start xD, Although, They are really annoying, so A fix is being found! As for the elastic and the various dialouge, I wanted the level to be taken light-heartedly, so springly lights and crude jokes seemed the way to do it x3 I know that asking for Stars and hearts isn't the most honourable thing to do, but it helps x3 I'll take it down as soon as/ if I reach 150 plays. That's where I'll consider it good enough to not be begging xD -- Thanks again for the comments and criticism guys, I'll be working upon it ^^

2010-04-25 15:39:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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I just got round to playing it again after you updated it. I actually think I preferred it before, it's way to foggy... and I'm not sure the green lights suit a factory... Although, keep the "Shove through you fatty" and "Sprint you slowpoke" a bit of humour is always a nice touch even on the most serious of levels. EDIT: Congratulations! This post made this thread move to cool levels .

2010-04-25 21:39:00 Author: Doopz Posts: 5592

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Woo! *Backflip* Not sure how that makes much difference to anything but nevermind! I am now officially allowing myself to Declare that I'm working on a sequel(ish thing) which is going to be much better, as I'm getting help from friends along the way. I'll make it less foggy too, that seems to be a common complaint now. Oh, and the green lights actually do suit the sequel due to the darkness settings.

2010-04-25 22:07:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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Hi, I played your level. It's pretty similar to mine, which is called "The tanks factory". In fact, they are so similar that someone else could think we copied each other xD. I'll give you some feedback, you can do the same if you with to The level is cool, you got an interesting atmosphere. Overall, I gave it 5* and labeled it beautifully. Little bit more into detail: GOOD - the visual aspect is really cool - the secrets, and the yellow light which helps finding them - the gameplay is funny THINGS COULD BE IMPROVED - the green lights are a bit little bit out of context - the level is rather short. That's not necessarily a problem though - the level is too horizontal and flat. You have to go right all the time. Perhaps you could improve this aspect. This would give the level a touch of complexity really nice Well, that's all, I really liked the level and enjoyed paying it. If you have time, I would like you to let my know your opinion about my level.

2010-04-27 12:05:00 Author: onturenio Posts: 138

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Thanks for the feedback, I'll be switching the lights now, and straight after, I'll get to your Tank Factory ^^ EDIT: Changed the lighting and edited a few more corners for smoother gameplay. It'd be great if one of the first people to play and give criticism played it again and gave their thoughts on it now compared to then. :3

2010-04-27 12:11:00 Author: Skeggers Posts: 583

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