Archive: 9 posts

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Yay! Finally was able to finish the prologue XD Doran is a three part story me and my brother made years ago, and it's kinda evolved from there to where it actually has a point. I am not trying to actually write a good version that actually means something, so... yeah. http://docs.google.com/View?id=ds3929t_61dvm9vgcx Prologue! :O And yeah, this story is actually where I got my name Rock Sauron from... long story, but it has nothing to do with LOTR. Sorry! Anyway, yeah, enjoy... I hope. Give me some feedback though, I really want to become a writer, so yeah any feedback on stuff would be great. :kz: INDEX: PROLOGUE: http://docs.google.com/View?id=ds3929t_61dvm9vgcx CHAPTER 1: http://docs.google.com/View?id=ds3929t_87gzdb7bcd

2010-01-30 19:11:00 Author: RockSauron Posts: 10882

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Alright, Rocky, another fantastic story 1. VERY nicely written. The characters have personality and depth, as noted by the Prince's nervousness and the Captain's clumsiness. 2. The story is original, and you maintained it ambiguous throughout the prologue. You can't predict what will happen next; that's a good thing, a very good thing. Looking forward to more; kudos to your brother.

2010-01-31 02:45:00 Author: Astrosimi Posts: 2046

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Hahahaha Gracias Astro... yeah, I kinda don't wanna say too much since they're be three books and a lot of the actual story won't be told till MUCH later on... but, um... /runs

2010-02-02 21:33:00 Author: RockSauron Posts: 10882

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I like this, Rock, and you should definitely think about continuing it and fleshing it out. It was very descriptive and visual, and I like how you set up this prologue to have alot of parallel narratives going at the same time... when you write all the rest, chapters from different perspectives all occurring at the same time would be very cool, with perspectives switching off and then ending up with everybody in the same place like you had going a little here. Only feedback I can give is to always try to think of interesting and nice sounding choices of words, and always think about your grammar and punctuation. You don't have to have perfect grammar to be a good writer, because most writers have people who proofread for them and edit, but it doesn't hurt to always stay on your toes. I used to try and write reviews for a friend of mine's gaming fansite, and he was always nitpicking my writing, but it helped me become a better writer. You're a good writer, better than I was at your age, and I honestly am not that great with writing fiction. I also was interested in reading this because Doran is one of my family's surnames.

2010-02-03 00:17:00 Author: Unknown User

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^ Thanks Yeah, my brother also tells me I was better then he was at my age. He's been telling me that ever since I first starting writing back in 5th grade some stupid story about... well, I was making it up as I go along and yeah. About the switching between people... I'm not too sure about using it the entire story. I can probably use it more during "action" or "high tension" scenes... Yeah, that'd be fun Also, this won't be called Doran. I only called it such because the name of the planet is Doran- I have no clue what to call the trilogy- our old name "Battle for Light Saga".. .well, this isn't really a "Battle for Light"... yeah, we basically just wrote these as videogames. Odd how I've transformed them into having meaning. At any rate... I'd like to say my dream. My dream in life is for me to successively publish all three books, and for my brother to succeed in becoming a Film Director. Then me and my brother could write the script for the movies, and my brother would transform all three books into a movie series. Yeah that'd rawk ^-^ Getting a bit ahead of myself here... still need to write first book. I know how it'll end, and have a general idea of how to get there- I'll need to make a bare-bones checklist of what should happen in what order soon so I have some idea how I'm proceeding. Anyway... yep, thanks for the moral support ^-^. Hearing random people, especially random people I don't know too well but I know to be "artsy", say that my writing is excellent really boosts my self esteem... which at the moment I kinda need :/. YAY!

2010-02-03 11:27:00 Author: RockSauron Posts: 10882

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I kinda had a feeling writing was your hidden talent but now we have it on display, very well writen!! Consider me impressed, Mr.Sauron.

2010-02-03 11:35:00 Author: Zwollie Posts: 2173

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Yes, I read the prologue. I quite enjoyed it actually. I remember when you told me the story of how you got your name xD This bit of writing was extremely vivid and well thought out. I would definitely read the book (teehee). I already knew you were very creative but this just comes to show HOW creative someone can get. What else can I say? The prologue is definitely enticing and has that great "narrative hook" so it got the job done well. The full story itself is going to be great from the looks of things too. So yes, I'm impressed. :kz:

2010-02-06 16:36:00 Author: iGotFancyPants Posts: 1355

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Yarg... yeah, been a while, but I finally got around to writing Chapter 1 today. Hasn't been edited by my brother yet, so yeah, any thoughts? :O

2010-06-02 21:35:00 Author: RockSauron Posts: 10882

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Well, I enjoyed this new chapter quite a lot. Your writing is excellent, very well organized, and vivid. The story is equally captivating; it truly seems professional. Please, do continue writing - Someone must quench our boredom

2010-06-16 23:22:00 Author: Astrosimi Posts: 2046

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