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Broken Dreams Part 1: Basic Training

Archive: 21 posts


(description of series and part of the first level's description)
"Set in a utopian future where most of sackilization has suddenly been destroyed, you are an elite commando-in-training who will be sent out into the shattered dreamscape to find out what happened."

A rather short platformer with a techno-futuristic, somewhat dark style. Since i'm new, i wanted to make something short to test my skills; i didn't even make it up to the first big tick mark on the thermometer!

http://www.mediafire.com/imgbnc.php/9915d7ca94370d9af2637ef80b9f62a36g.jpg

http://www.mediafire.com/imgbnc.php/fbc49c0187de8a192a9057fb5d5d961d4g.jpg

http://www.mediafire.com/imgbnc.php/e35c3af8d63a0d9515faaad2585387594g.jpg

http://www.mediafire.com/imgbnc.php/3fbd912570825b6cde287245e46104e24g.jpg

I'll be happy to check out your level, unless it's something in the horror genre. i really hate horror type stuff and will not end up playing it, sorry.

Edit: added a blog post (http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/entry.php?945-Notes-on-Broken-Dreams-Part-1) with some of what i'm sure are some fairly uninteresting notes about development. You can check it out if you want though.
2010-01-19 03:45:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


Hi, I played your level and I want some feedback on my level: "Little Big Silent Hill 2: The Monsters that Make Everything Go Black, Spray Blood Everywhere, and Kill You Slowly"

Lol, Just Kidding... I plan to give this level a try as soon as possible and I'll give you some good feedback!
2010-01-19 05:03:00

Author:
Devonushka
Posts: 95


Thanks! 2010-01-19 05:14:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


Solid platforming...but way too short my friend! I like the idea of have instructions, but eventually it got a little annoying having to stop and read when the way through was pretty obvious. I liked how you used the speed setting to mess with the spinning platforms, i've never seen that done and it created a fresh challenge that you don't get alot. My only suggestion would be to decorate a bit more, and possibly make it longer.

If your up for it I would appreciate some feedback on some of my levels: Elemental Temple of Fire and Water!

Hope to hear back from you!
2010-01-19 19:57:00

Author:
shawneboi
Posts: 221


Cool, i'll be stopping by later with the feedback.

I'll definitely make this longer at some point, though i want to work on part two a bit more first

As far as the dialogs, which parts specifically were annoying? the last couple of parts? i can remove those. I'll have to think about what sort of decoration fits in with my style as well...

If you guys are interested in how those spinning platforms came about, i was messing around with ideas for that section of my level and i wanted to add those classic platforms that alternate between passable and impassable, but i couldn't figure out how to do it short of some fancy logic i couldn't make at the time (i later figured people were using wobble bolts i think). So i ended up with that!
2010-01-19 20:11:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


I played your level, and it was a good, basic obstacle course, but I made a list of things for you to change:
1) You really don't need instructions on every obstacle, it's better for the player to figure things out themselves. (Though you might want to leave the instructions on the spinning platforms that slow down
2) You need more decorations, its very very bland
3) It should be longer, really, I know that your thermometer isn't filled up yet.

That's all, the game play was good and I'm sure that the rest of the series will be good!
2010-01-19 23:29:00

Author:
Devonushka
Posts: 95


Thanks for the feedback, i'll correct some of those now.2010-01-20 01:03:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


I'll try it and test it out...2010-01-20 01:08:00

Author:
Emogotsaone
Posts: 1030


Just updated with some theme improvements and a few cuts to the dialogue.2010-01-20 01:37:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


RCIX,

Just tried to replay your level, and when I reached the section just after the lift launches you up, the swing wasn't there for me to get across. Just giving you a heads up before too many people play it.
2010-01-20 02:42:00

Author:
shawneboi
Posts: 221


Ah, i forgot i had swung across it once and didn't put it back; Fixed now!2010-01-20 03:14:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


Alright, much better now that you have put some small decorations in there. Believe it or not it makes a HUGE difference. Still wish it was longer, but i'll just have to wait until you post more in the series.

Thanks for the feedback on my levels...you've been great!
2010-01-20 03:21:00

Author:
shawneboi
Posts: 221


Yep, part two is in the works.

You're very welcome, anytime you got a level i'll prolly check it out
2010-01-20 03:35:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


My returned F4F:

+ The platforms that slow down are very clever and original.
+ Spelling. Hooray , finally someone in LBP who can actually spell. I find the bad spelling in most levels really annoying and it's a rare treat to play one with good spelling and grammar. Well done.

- A bit on the short side.
- The camera angle at the start is bad. I couldn't see where to drop until I'd died once.
- The sloped steps with fire on are difficult because the 'safe' edge is a bit too small. I got frustrated with them.
2010-01-21 16:49:00

Author:
mistervista
Posts: 2210


I played your level RCIX! I liked it and for a first level it was pretty good.

Pros: As others have said, the slow down idea for the spinning platforms was fresh and well executed.
The challenges were well done for the most part.

Things to consider: Fix the camera angle at the beginning so you know where to jump down. The first thing I did was jump into a giant pit of gas! xD
Work on the aesthetics of your level. As it has been said, I'm sure you have plenty of thermo space left so use it all to improve the look and feel of the level!

With all considered, however this was a good level and you don't have to change a thing if you don't want to. Good luck with future productions!
2010-01-21 22:13:00

Author:
TruePhilosopher
Posts: 15


Thanks fur the further feedback, there used to be a speech bubble showing that jump at first.


My returned F4F:
- The sloped steps with fire on are difficult because the 'safe' edge is a bit too small. I got frustrated with them.


You're lucky, those things used to be even shorter! seriously though i will make them a little easier.

The style is something i'll have to think about more; maybe even ask for some help from people
2010-01-21 22:36:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


Nice little platformer ya got there. I think you have a good idea how to make some good platforming. It's somewhat challenging, but not cheap. Keep it up!!!2010-01-26 01:04:00

Author:
smasher
Posts: 641


Bumping: I didn't get to my visual overhaul yet (a better theming is in the works), but i did manage to get some pictures!2010-02-06 23:14:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


Ok, I can give you some feedback here.

First of all, I wouldn't worry about visual overhaul yet. You've got the basics of the create engine down, now you need to work on some level design and gameplay strategies. For a first level, it's not bad at all. In the grand scheme of things, you've got a lot of work to do.

What I liked about the level was that it flowed nicely and there were some innovative concepts. Your speed-sensitive rotators were interesting. There was a lot of vertical and horizontal gameplay, so it was interesting to navigate. Lots of first levels consist of "run to the right" only. Your geometry was very nice and I didn't see any ugly corners or holes in the design anywhere.

My first criticism of the level is a complete lack of layers. The level is entirely in 2D. Your first goal as a creator should be to ditch this habit asap. Here's usually where I tell people to go back to the story levels and take a close look at their construction. The savannah levels are excellent to pick apart. Most walking surfaces should be 1-thick. Use layers to move the walking surface back and forth in the depth plane, or use them decoratively. A prime example of where this should have been done was the little flap you come out of... the flap is heavy and hard to get through. Had you turned the flap into a 1-thick bridge", sackboy could have run in front of it.

Second criticism is that there were a lot of gameplay elements that were more frustrating than fun. Another common mistake for beginners. Take the flaming staircase for example. On one hand its a challenge to climb, but really it comes down to very tedious manipulation of the analog stick while jumping so you don't touch the stairs. Simply put, tedious things are not fun for [most] people. The difference between challenging and frustrating is that challenging obstacles can usually be overcome with a few tries because the player has a chance to learn from his mistakes. Frustrating means that you have to get lucky or partake in "twitch gaming" to pass it.

Other than that, I think its a good effort really. Yes, the level is visually bare, but you've already said you're working on that part.
2010-02-07 02:55:00

Author:
Thegide
Posts: 1465


Great first level. I liked the revolving platforms that slow down. Like a few others in the thread I was a bit thrown off by the camera angle at the start. I can see your next level being a very good platforming level. Keep up the good work.2010-02-07 18:20:00

Author:
shindol
Posts: 78


Ok, I can give you some feedback here.

First of all, I wouldn't worry about visual overhaul yet. You've got the basics of the create engine down, now you need to work on some level design and gameplay strategies. For a first level, it's not bad at all. In the grand scheme of things, you've got a lot of work to do.

What I liked about the level was that it flowed nicely and there were some innovative concepts. Your speed-sensitive rotators were interesting. There was a lot of vertical and horizontal gameplay, so it was interesting to navigate. Lots of first levels consist of "run to the right" only. Your geometry was very nice and I didn't see any ugly corners or holes in the design anywhere.

My first criticism of the level is a complete lack of layers. The level is entirely in 2D. Your first goal as a creator should be to ditch this habit asap. Here's usually where I tell people to go back to the story levels and take a close look at their construction. The savannah levels are excellent to pick apart. Most walking surfaces should be 1-thick. Use layers to move the walking surface back and forth in the depth plane, or use them decoratively. A prime example of where this should have been done was the little flap you come out of... the flap is heavy and hard to get through. Had you turned the flap into a 1-thick bridge", sackboy could have run in front of it.

Second criticism is that there were a lot of gameplay elements that were more frustrating than fun. Another common mistake for beginners. Take the flaming staircase for example. On one hand its a challenge to climb, but really it comes down to very tedious manipulation of the analog stick while jumping so you don't touch the stairs. Simply put, tedious things are not fun for [most] people. The difference between challenging and frustrating is that challenging obstacles can usually be overcome with a few tries because the player has a chance to learn from his mistakes. Frustrating means that you have to get lucky or partake in "twitch gaming" to pass it.

Other than that, I think its a good effort really. Yes, the level is visually bare, but you've already said you're working on that part.
First, thanks for the feedback, it's always appreciated

About the 2d part, it's going to take some time but i think i can fix that. I'll have to take some time and think about some multi-layer stuff i can do. Or, i could of course just drop it down to a single layer

Wow, i thought the flaming staircase was fine, nobody (well one person) complained about it until now, and even then i patched to to make it easier! I'll think of something to replace it though.

The flap i can fix.



Great first level. I liked the revolving platforms that slow down. Like a few others in the thread I was a bit thrown off by the camera angle at the start. I can see your next level being a very good platforming level. Keep up the good work.
Hmm, i thought i fixed that. What wasn't clear?
2010-02-07 23:39:00

Author:
RCIX
Posts: 250


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