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#1

"Fort Husky"

Archive: 21 posts

This is my first completed level and i need some feedback so i know where to improve for future levels ^^

The storyline isn't anything spectacular, and the theme isn't exactly unique,
i just wanted to know that i was capable of finishing something
(i have a bad habit of getting bored of an idea before i finish it)

story:
Your friend Husky invites you to his castle and wants to race you to the top where he has a present for you!

there's 4 secrets for you to find on the way as well

http://spamtheweb.com/ul/upload/130409/1924_A_Photo_1.jpg
http://spamtheweb.com/ul/upload/130409/1947_A_Photo_2.jpg
http://spamtheweb.com/ul/upload/130409/1993_A_Photo_3.jpg		2009-04-12 23:32:00

Author:
Dexiro
Posts: 2100

i'm actually desperate to come up with a new name for this level D:
the name castle pilot is really annoying me

because the story and theme are so simple i really can't think of anything besides "castle race" which makes it sound really boring		2009-04-13 06:35:00

Author:
Dexiro
Posts: 2100

Maybe change it so he bets he can run faster than you, and call it:

Castle: The $10 Wager		2009-04-13 07:15:00

Author:
dkjestrup
Posts: 672

How about "fort husky"

changes complete		2009-04-13 08:14:00

Author:
Dexiro
Posts: 2100

Just to tell you, you can edit your first post, click "Go Advanced" then change the title of your thread.2009-04-13 09:29:00

Author:
Whalio Cappuccino
Posts: 5250

thanks

don't forget to check out my level if you get the chance, still looking for feedback		2009-04-13 09:38:00

Author:
Dexiro
Posts: 2100

Neat level, really good for a first level. Now, onto the good and the bad:

+ Fun platforming. Although it is simple, it is fun. Better than a level that has you jumping up a bunch of stairs
+ It has a story and custom characters. A lot of levels lack these
+ It was fun to race up the castle
+ Looks good, although a bit simple
+ Good presentation (I like the gift at the end with the bubbles)

- Not very detailed visuals. Sure, it looks sorta like a LBP castle, but it's nothing amazing
- The level is quite short, but seeing as this is your first level, not such a big deal.

F4F: Frost (in sig)		2009-04-14 00:22:00

Author:
cornontheCOD
Posts: 150

6 plays! WTF is wrong!?!?!

Lol, I'll play it:

Nice choice of music

lol@cat

Dominos were cool.

Lol, you race a dog? Legend!


Overall, the level has a fun visual style, and was short but sweet. 4/5, hearted. Great Job!		2009-04-14 01:43:00

Author:
dkjestrup
Posts: 672

6 plays! WTF is wrong!?!?!

yeah the plays are coming in awfully slow D:

i'm following that guide in the help section,
made a custom icon, got a better name and i republish every 4-5 hours but i'm lucky if i get 1 play each time

thanks for the comments anyway 		2009-04-14 02:36:00

Author:
Dexiro
Posts: 2100

I'ts hard to get a lot of plays. i've gotten one almost up to 350, but thats the best i could do, and i think im a pretty good creator. of course, i cant republish every 4-5 hours, but still...

anyhow, i played this level, and it was a fun one, simple, easy to play. reminded me of the first few levels of lbp's story mode. nothing to different or dangerous, but i do like a few things that you almost never see-

the nifty way to climb, with the wobble bolts... don't think i've ever seen that.

the things you knock over to climb that hill were pretty cool.

all the materials were well thought to go with each other.

all in all, you are on the track of becoming a real creator, instead of one of those no-patience types who build ramp levels and levels with rockets attached to oddly angled cats with wheels.

I'm glad to see you join us here at LBPC and i cannot wait to see what your next levels will be. thanks for creating a quality level for the community!		2009-04-14 13:58:00

Author:
TJapan
Posts: 225

This is a good first level!

Here are my highlights:

- You understood right away that flat decoration rules! I hate it when I jump in certain level and end up landing on objects I didn't want to because the background deco was on the last large layer. Thin layer deco for the win!!

- I like your domino stairs. This is something original i've never seen before.

- I love bubble boxes! Who would have guessed?

- I love those rotating thingny and they felt original to me.

http://i454.photobucket.com/albums/qq262/RangerX_photos/lovethoserotatingthings.jpg


And now the bad news! (ok it's not really bad )

- It's a bit short for my liking. Better be short and good (like your level) than short and boring!

- It could have been more decorated but here you totally can pull the "it's my first level" card on me.

- I wonder if you knew that bubbles you collect on the pad don't count on your score? I mean, it's not a huge grip but I would have like to really collect the bubbles at the end.

.		2009-04-15 04:18:00

Author:
RangerZero
Posts: 3901

- It's a bit short for my liking. Better be short and good (like your level) than short and boring!

- It could have been more decorated but here you totally can pull the "it's my first level" card on me.

- I wonder if you knew that bubbles you collect on the pad don't count on your score? I mean, it's not a huge grip but I would have like to really collect the bubbles at the end.
.

it was meant to be quite a lot longer originally but i got hit with the unglue glitch twice :S
i usually try to build my levels in sections, but for some reason i ended up glueing the entire thing together on this one

another reason why it was so short is because i kept getting creative block. that's kind of why there isn't much deco too, not really sure how to decorate a castle xD

and are you sure the bubbles collected on the pad don't count? i'm sure it had an affect on my score. either way it's sort of there just to give the ending more of an impact

thanks for the feedback anyway 		2009-04-15 05:15:00

Author:
Dexiro
Posts: 2100

I enjoyed the level... Very fun.. I wish it was more detailed. But the platforming was enjoyable.

Got my heart.

I would give more info, but everyone else sort of covered the same stuff I had in my notes.

The nice thing is that even though you did a fairly simple style level, your approach to it was nice and different... Like the dominoes section. It could have been cool to have that be more of a Rube Goldberg sort of thing... Like they have to complete a little puzzle to get something to knock them down to be able to get up them.		2009-04-15 16:44:00

Author:
dobi6
Posts: 359

Checked this out the other night and for a first level it's not bad at all! I liked that all the platforming sections seem to work the way they are supposed to - didn't have any weird glitch type mishaps which is impressive for a first level. Concept for the level is fun too. I like the idea of the race against the dog and I especially liked that you let the player win by just a little bit as the dog swoops in. Nice touch.

All the materials made sense and the decoration, while a little minimal, were nicely done. The lighting is a little flat for my taste but it's not too dark - it's just the same all the way through. Lighting is usually an afterthought for a lot of creators but it can really set a mood for a level or make certain areas really pop out.

I'm not a fan of bubbles on the scoreboard either. If you don't rush to get them they won't count and who needs that kind of pressure. lol

On the whole I liked it and gave it three stars. I'm looking forward to seeing more of your creations. Keep sharing them! 		2009-04-15 21:17:00

Author:
Morgana25
Posts: 5983

I liked this level, it felt a little bland in places but other than a bit of polish the look was good. Everything (visually and audially) felt right together so the level hangs together as a whole. There was a nice assortment of platforming elements to work through, I particularly liked the dominoes, partly because I didn't see them initially and this confused me.

Cons:


Too short etc etc.
Not much challenge - though this might be a good thing initially, judging challenge vs enjoyment seems to be an issue for a lot of people in the community.
more detail in the background would be nice.
linked with 2, more hazards would be good, there are very few places where you can die on the level.


Finally:
Secrets. Don't tell people there are secrets at the beginning of the level. Tell them at the end, along with how many they found. Even something simple like a panel with "secrets found: 1,2,3,4" and lights next to the numbers. You tell me I missed some secrets at the end and I'll play again to find them!

Anyway, good job.		2009-04-16 00:42:00

Author:
rtm223
Posts: 6497

thanks for the advice!

i guess there wasn't really a good moment to have something showing the secrets you've found since you fall onto the exit, although i suppose i could of made one ^^

i'll definatly do that on my next level 		2009-04-16 02:23:00

Author:
Dexiro
Posts: 2100

Just played your level, typing feedback as I play.

+ Level looks good on the outside sections, you've used the right materials and it looks clean and tidy
+ Good domino stairs, don't think I've ever seen that idea before
+ Nice characters
+ Good solid platforming sections

- Castle looks bland, not much detail to please the eye
- I got stuck under the bulldog on top of the castle, took some getting out
- The level is rather easy
- Its short

This is a good level, solid to play with some instresting ideas, you need to increase the length and difficulty a little though. Well done

**** rating

My F4F is in sig		2009-04-16 11:24:00

Author:
GruntosUK
Posts: 1754

Short but sweet. The race to the top was great...I struggled a bit on the rotating platforms and only just beat that dude to the finishing post, so it gave me a good feeling to do it all by the skin of my teeth. I think I found three of the four secrets too, but it's hard to search for them when you're under time pressure. Gameplay wise this was a quick blast of good fun and ran smoothly without any glitches, but it could benefit from more aesthetic detail in some parts, if you have time to add spit and polish.2009-04-18 20:15:00

Author:
Ungreth
Posts: 2130

This is a great first level and a lot of fun! While simple, I think the plot worked just fine. The level was well designed with some unique platforming elements. The domino walls to get up the hill were very nice!

Other members have pointed out a lot of my criticisms, like length and the lack of detail, but really, I think it's a good first level and those two things don't matter that much. I look forward to what you come up with in the future! Good job!		2009-04-18 23:43:00

Author:
mrsupercomputer
Posts: 1335

Yeah, I agree with mrsupercomputer. It's a great first level! It's obvious that you have what it takes to make some great levels. Fort Husky is a solid, fun little adventure. It's clean, nothing looks out of place and it's nice to see some of the smaller details you payed attention to, like the tiny little plants. I thought it was fun, and hope to see more stuff from you in the future dexiro. My suggestions...turn the music box and the winch attached to the dog to invisible. Overall, really good job.2009-04-27 19:34:00

Author:
Jaeyden
Posts: 564

Hey Dexiro,

I know you said you didn't really need feedback on your levels but I figured I should return the favor anyhow.

So I played Fort Husky.

My impressions are fairly similar to those that other people have mentioned on this thread. It's a cute fun level. It's not particularly long or challenging. However, there are some good secrets to find.

http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=513&pictureid=4508

Right off the bat with the music and cartoony designs you do a good job setting the mood. The cat looks good and there's even a couple secrets right at the beginning which is great!

http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=513&pictureid=4509

I like dominoes. The last piece of the bridge slid off for me. I don't know if this has happened to others or if it's ever made the level impossible for someone to complete. I'd recommend changing these to wobble bolts on a permanent switch rather than relying on gravity. When sackboy hits the first one it knocks them over setting off the chain and forming the bridge.

http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=513&pictureid=4510

I found the secret on the top of these platforms during the race. It being a race I wasn't completely happy that finding the secret sent me down to the bottom. It also looked like some pieces fell off that weren't supposed to.

http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=513&pictureid=4511

I really enjoyed these wobble bolt grab switches. They were quite surprising but good!

http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=513&pictureid=4512

You may want to tune this launch pad a little bit. It stays in the raised position. You should reverse the flipper type and place a thin layer over the front so sackboy can't get crushed. This is the technique MM uses for their launch pads.

http://www.lbpcentral.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=513&pictureid=4513

I was mean and dragged Husky off the ledge. In general, now that CY and creator pack 1 are out you may want to go through the level quickly and make some of these connections invisible. It doesn't take long and it will do a lot for some of the visuals.

Finally, I should add that I dislike point bubbles on the scoreboard. It's a pain to grab them before the level records your score. I'd highly recommend shifting the scoreboard a little to the right so sackboy can collect the reward and then walk to the exit. Maybe even use the extra space to implement one of the previous suggestions of recording what secrets were found to encourage replays.

I gave it 4 stars and cute.		2009-06-14 21:30:00

Author:
dcf
Posts: 468


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