Archive: 1360 posts

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tea time and got executed Xtrahuman is the person responsible for this thread which has horrible grammar and is growing rather slowly like no other thread has before, and just when you thought it was about to end, a marshmallow came down from the sky and squished its gelatin which oozed out all over my potato chips next to my TV remote which held all of the secrets to the forbidden temple of the Chia pet in addition to the channels of my TV which counted as high as 656 or 959, if you looked at the TV upside down, which caused the TV to turn the screen upside down for you and defied the laws of physics, however it's okay because I don't believe in the laws of physics because I am a creationist who likes cheese on the spaghetti I eat when Mario requests it for dinner while teaching Luigi how to carry a franchise on your shoulders during the 1929 depression which affected me, meanwhile I go on a search for a golden turtle with the power of flight for carrying babies and dropping them into baskets that were filled with snakes which were allergic to the babies, who scared the snakes which bit the baby, giving him an allergic reaction to biscuits cut in half with jelly in between to make a biscuit sandwich thingy that caused an explosion that ruined my reputation, and yet the baby ate too many sandwiches causing him to suddenly hate LBP2, so I then banished him to the land of large, sweaty buffalo, which promptly began to lick me in comraderie, then put me back in my mom's basement, which was filled with creepy giant octopi and oysters filled with oysters, so they could fill themselves with even more oysters so as to create an infinite loop of oyster-ception, causing the collapse of civilization as we know it without any wild xtrahuman to stop it... oh wait there he is, with ten pounds of fried pinto beans to save the world somehow, but pinto beans can't reproduce, so he had to grab a nice lunch, which had a sandwich and a pickle which was tasty, but the pickle was the TV again, which still was upside down but I flipped it, making people into Frankenturrets, so GLaDOS got a hold of a tank of neurotoxin, and she choked everyone in the Enrichment Center, but I was cast off into space, meaning everything in Aperture returned to more or less normal, until Valve made Portal 3, in which Wheatley returns from space after GLaDOS needs his help, because Chell is gone and Aperture needs test subjects, so GLaDOS gives Wheatley legs and arms and makes him a subject, so Wheatley is the playable character then, meaning he's not in space, so meme users spammed the internet with "I'M NOT IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE," which made Valve send out an update that replaced the space core with the curiosity core, but the fans got sick of hearing "Who are you?" instead of "I'M IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!!!," at which point I stepped in a pile of SHAAAAAAAAAVING CREAM, although it was rather messy and such, so I got a free refund from real estate agencies and cranky old men, and then I went to the park to go poop on the hedges while eating a lobster and being stalked by Orville Redenbacher, then I told him "Your popcorn is simply scrumptious!", when my dog ate the rest of it because it thought it was edible gold, when in reality it was just buttered popcorn which had been pooped on by that dog, until a meteor hit the dog and split him into a thousand puppies, which started to eat people's food from the park which lead to massive famine and caused massive groups of humans commit cannibalism just to survive, and then the survivors created their own religion that worshipped the god of TV and dogs who grants his disciples remote controls and dog food which they gratefully take and use for their lunatic intentions of taking over Jupiter and making it their ultimate base of weapons, factories, and other helpful equipments to take over the dog population of Saturn, but at that moment the dogs on Saturn made a huge skyscraper which intercepted the lunatic's airship which caused a giant explosion in the middle and, thankfully the dogs managed to survive somehow, and then they decided to make a counter-attack on the human population which resulted in the first Galactic War between humans and dogs in space, and in the end the human race was in threat to go extinct when suddenly a giant turret arose and started to shoot rapidly at the dogs, who whimpered in great agony and they had to go to the canine hospital to get treatment for their injuries which were all over their legs, making most of them invalid and severely inhibiting the ones who always deliver pizza to the bystanders, including the cats which were doing something suspicious on their home planet Felinia when the humans and dogs were busy going to other planets to get more resources for their weaponry and at that moment they heard a loud roar from another galaxy signaling the entrance of the squirrels to this realm, which meant the cats finally had natural prey to hunt for their kittens and eat them for dinner, except when it comes to cat population's official guards, who refuse to eat new animals unless they are proven to be tasty by the Institution of Feline Victuals which is owned by a large company that looks out for feline needs and the company's owner is a tuxedo cat named Muffins who is technically the ruler of the planet Felinia but also makes voyages to other planets which can be pretty dangerous especially if he has to cross the Acidway, Milkyway's neighboring galaxy, that, as the name implies, is deadly for having galactic clouds full of acid in the atmosphere, and so to avoid this, Muffins has created a special device which allows him to move past the acid clouds without harm, and so he uses it to reach an infamous planet which is known across the galaxy as Murrdurr, the dark planet and the home of TenebrisNemo, and that's why Muffins is currently undergoing surgery on his lungs so he can breathe long enough to kill TenebrisNemo's servants whom L1N3R1D3R liked, so he prepared for battle to support TenebrisNemo's prosperity by killing his servants which was a bad desicion because the servants were plotting against him all along and they were ready for the assassination of L1N3R1D3R but Muffins couldn't let that happen because he liked both L1N3R1D3R and TenebrisNemo's pizzas that had every topping imaginable so Muffins came up with a plan which involved the acquisition of Sleepy Shotgun which used sleep powder to make his foes sleepily sleep and to throw them inside a clown disguised bag for keeping all the candy away from the king of the moon, who desperately wanted some Butterfinger but couldn't get any because he is a king who by necessity eats only fancy foods except on Wednesdays when he gorges on all sorts of cheap candy and eats them like crazy until his stomach tells his body to stop but he won't stop, Bob now decided to steal from the King's candy chamber and was disappointed when he saw that all that was left was Butterfinger, so he exclaimed, but someone heard it, alerting the candy hungry guards that candy was being stolen by Bob, who was now experiencing major pain in the form of lashes to L1N3R1D3R who was apparently Bob's voodoo doll who was boiled in water and served to a bunch of slaves who were in a great happy feeling once the cat said "Tonight we feast!" and he began to chow on my signature diarrhea pasta while a meteor hit the pasta and splattered my face all over the news and onto the TNT which started to dance in front of midgets astronauts equipped with Sir monacle plushies with super cannons and suddenly the whole lot exploded into bits but then I woke up with a Sir monacle plushie who was so twisted that I burned him into a Sir monacle plushie who was burned by TenebrisNemo's other Sir monacle plushie who was wearing illuminati suit to activate his powers to dominate TenebrisNemo's bedroom with a pizza party witch who conjured a Sir monacle plushie to torture the actual Sir monacle with sticks and salt in basement "Russia Soviet Russia", where no one will survive the Sir monacle plushie's wrath, however L1N3R1D3R returned and saved Sir monacle and TenebrisNemo's Sir monacle plushie from the evil Sir monacle plushie, witch had a Sir monacle plushie for her wizard husband TenebrisNemo who loved his witch wife so much that he bought her a lollipop chainsaw with mega doom blast power and together they bought Sir monacle plushies for their future children in the mysterious planet of Murrdurr where Sir monacle plushie's monocles are being sold in local stores all over the world and the universe, where they plan to take over planet Munacle, which is home of the Ms Munacle teddy's evil secret lair full of dog population's secret weapons that she locked up because the weapons were powerful enough to destroy her entire mound of garbage in the Trazh moon, home of the dog population's good prince, Dogarus, great fan of Bozo the clown and a charismatic golden retriever with a peculiar interest for lollipops which are made by the Lollipop Guild in the sir monacle plushie's own home planet, also where the fat people are happy, round brownie population thrive, and pizza monsters wander the dank meme streets of the internet, wondering where the taco truck opens on Tuesdays for their weekly hamburger supreme special with taco meat, salsa, and cats which came from a mysterious wormhole, however the monsters favourite ice cream truck is closed due to the arrival of the Dark Lord TenebrisNemo and his sidekick Sir monacle plushie who obeys his master's every command to destroy humanity with destructive world end machines which operate using a giant remote control from Bozo the Clown's pants which are known from Bozo's story ark in Star Trek the Musical which is a well-known musical starring Brad Pitt as Bozo the Clown's pants in a tarantula pit with Ron Weasley who is suffering from hypothermia because he ate my chilly pepper with his macaroni, which resulted in causing him to gain gastro-oesophageal reflux disease which made him become a vegetable that tastes like a lollipop because Ron's wand was broken in such a way that anything he tried to cast backfired on Hermione and gave her awkward situations which involved her and Ron kissing while Voldemort was screaming "Why am I here?" while Harry Potter had to prevent Majora's moon crashing into the world; meanwhile, lazy Mario was eating some mushrooms and growing big so he could mass murder some turtles and put them in his soup of destruction and eat it with pleasure while taunting Browser who was so angry that he breathed fire, but as always he hired some turtles and I miss the rains down in Africa because they gave me joy because I am a lone ape who just wants attention and bananas, but you give them instead to gorillas and that makes me annoyed, so I call for the Ape force which will aid me in escaping from the prison of Azkaban along with Sirius Black, the godfather of the boy who lived for a few minutes before being bullied by a spell named Imperius, which forced him to commit suicide by using a spoon to poke himself in the earlobe but that didn't kill him so he then tried a golf-club right through his heart, SPLISSHHH and the result was breathtaking *ba-dum TSS!* and at the sight of this, Snape lost his mind and started to call his fellow colonels including John Brutus who is known for usurping his title from another colonel with an army of mice who ate through his provisions, "Oh what a poo", he said when Snake suddenly appeared and got in to a Bo Staff fight with Snape who called Dumbledore for help but he was busy trying to teach Harry something about magic and puberty, but eventually Moody joined the fight and they fought like monkeys until Hermione joined the fight and stopped everyone with her wand which had previously broken but was fixed by a magical wizard whose name was Harrybo's Grandad, but pointlessly he was never a granddad so I shot him in the face, however the dog population started to breed werewolves who always interrupted my sleep, howling and destroying my rare glass mini-me collection which made me so angry that I slipped on my robe and fell into a rabbit hole, at least I didn't get injured but a white rabbit with a ticking clock recruited me in the war effort against the wizards, so I equipped myself The Sword of Suns which is known to most as the godly blade is able to ward off evil with a single slice at the cost of one's stamina, but fortunately I got a stamina upgrade and I'm able to glue together my rare glass mini-me collection while fighting against the evil wizards whom I begin to attack with my fellow party members who get angry at me, but I find a way to repay them using my hair and gold dust, and now the lot of them follow me to the end of my days and constantly heal me, allowing me to fight against the wizards without having to worry about my health points, but sometimes they use the wrong spell and send me flying over the Grand Canyon so fast that I broke the sound barrier which sounded cool but ultimately caused fatal injury to my ears and the surrounding birds, which was reported to be an alien attack, but when the authorities arrived, they confirmed that the cause of the sound was none other than myself, a hideous​ alien called jimydog000, straight from the planet Frewquip, which is known to have extreme weathers such as raining tornadoes, snowing snowmen, and misty lava storms, which makes the meteorologist have a bad time to forecast all those weathers and so he's paid a thousand platinum coins a day to pay off his mortgage and to keep him satisfied, because he needs to see his reflection, where he notices that he has a huge nose which is considered by the residents of Frewquip to be a mark of intelligence and charisma but by the residents of Earth its considered to be a sign of stupidity, so the weatherman didn't have any fan clubs on earth and in fact, they find him to be an ugly abomination because of his nose, so he decided to make the people on the earth follow his will by pointing out interesting facts about their inevitable death, like how Elvis was the best but died anyway and how Michael Jackson died and that made the people on earth very happy, but the Earthlings were not amused so they decided to retaliate with guns that are so powerful and dangerous that their kitten-bullets make every object which they hit turn adorable, which was the ultimate fate of Purrey, the cat groomer who turned into a big slimy dog whence our frog got its legs checked out and jumped of a cliff, where it squished onto the head of an octopus that decided to take a nap but now it's angry and wants to unleash its anger upon everything, living or not so it starts exacting its anger but something was going on that made it stop and look like a Goofy because he suddenly grew long ears and heard everything what I did and forced me to pay him 5 000 000 bucks because I was not paying attention to the teacher who apparently was a sir monacle plushie who got killed by a darklord who shouted: "THIS IS MORDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR!" and then ran around the halls but accidentally ran against a pillar and died, causing internal conflict between dark lords and dwarves over who would inherit the Monacle Throne, the trial of kings begins in the pits of Sir monacle plushies who were late for tea time and got executed... ...recalls ​the thread

2016-05-10 10:38:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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but this caused anger among the

2016-05-12 04:25:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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Sir monacle plushie forces

2016-05-12 06:35:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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who decided to attack the

2016-05-14 17:39:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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planet of maggots

2016-05-15 16:37:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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that ironically was being ruled by

2016-05-15 22:02:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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Sir monacle maggot who is known

2016-05-16 08:32:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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for breaking the rules he's set

2016-05-18 02:06:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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for himself and thus

2016-05-18 15:20:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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ruining life for him and

2016-05-19 04:25:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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everyone else who have

2016-05-19 16:42:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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lived on that planet including Nemo

2016-05-20 04:36:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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who is sitting on the Darklord's throne

2016-05-20 07:57:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and L1N3 who was enjoying

2016-05-20 23:40:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the ride of his glorious

2016-05-21 17:59:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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sled, but little did he know

2016-05-21 19:04:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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that he was on the dark castle's

2016-05-22 09:19:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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lawn, which meant that the dark

2016-05-22 22:44:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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castle was too big for the

2016-05-23 05:19:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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dark lord's own good so

2016-05-23 13:54:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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he left and donated the castle

2016-05-23 17:53:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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to starving children who liked

2016-05-23 22:55:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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to eat castle's stone pillars

2016-05-24 01:16:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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because it tasted like chocolate

2016-05-25 02:01:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and it brought happiness to

2016-05-25 08:57:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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their faces, but little did they

2016-05-25 13:50:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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know about the secret lair

2016-05-25 20:46:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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below the castle which stored 892

2016-05-28 23:28:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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bars of heavenly chocolate

2016-05-29 20:40:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which turned them into gods

2016-05-30 18:45:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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of all chocolates and so

2016-05-30 21:07:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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if you've ever heard of the

2016-05-31 02:07:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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milk man, you should know

2016-05-31 06:36:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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that he worshiped little kids

2016-06-01 13:53:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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who became chocolate gods

2016-06-01 20:02:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and their names were Billy, Sarah,

2016-06-02 04:26:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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John and Bob, who was the

2016-06-02 10:02:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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leader of the bunch, you know

2016-06-02 23:09:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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like the old Greek god Zeus

2016-06-03 08:55:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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who, apparently, is comprised of four children

2016-06-03 09:08:00 Author: jimydog000 Posts: 813

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that embody the four elements

2016-06-03 14:00:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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of the world, water, earth, fire, wind

2016-06-03 18:19:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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mills, except there weren't windmills

2016-06-04 00:32:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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because Don Quijote destroyed them

2016-06-04 06:58:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which upset Michael Rosen, who

2016-06-04 16:34:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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created those windmills when

2016-06-05 10:11:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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he was in Ms. Goodall's class

2016-06-05 18:04:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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which is known to have

2016-06-06 13:55:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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a strict no-breathing policy

2016-06-06 13:57:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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which is ridiculous because

2016-06-06 14:54:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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if you don't breathe, you will

2016-06-08 19:27:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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get a cancer which will kill

2016-06-11 17:42:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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all the bees in Europe,

2016-06-12 04:56:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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causing natural disorder

2016-06-12 22:13:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and reducing amounts of honey

2016-06-13 00:10:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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, making Winnie the Pooh very sad

2016-06-13 12:57:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and start searching people's houses

2016-06-13 16:44:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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for honey, but one day

2016-06-14 02:25:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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he found Tigger who was

2016-06-14 16:19:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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jumping around and

2016-06-14 22:29:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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yelling cuss words, which

2016-06-15 00:27:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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was caused by annoying gorillas

2016-06-15 04:42:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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stealing his signature song and

2016-06-15 17:52:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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destroying his home

2016-06-16 06:08:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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with rocket launchers, so Pooh

2016-06-16 17:33:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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decided to put things right

2016-06-17 21:40:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and drown them in honey,

2016-06-17 22:10:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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which was a success but

2016-06-19 19:50:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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led to Pooh being arrested

2016-06-20 05:15:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and sentenced to death by

2016-06-22 22:04:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Piglet, a major environmentalist, who

2016-06-23 01:55:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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was furious because of

2016-06-23 14:19:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Eeyore being lazy and not

2016-06-23 19:13:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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working for the community

2016-06-24 12:22:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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because he walks too slowly,

2016-06-24 16:57:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and tries to build homes for the homeless

2016-06-24 20:02:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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turtles, but what he doesn't know

2016-06-24 21:24:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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is gravity which collapses

2016-06-24 22:12:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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homes that have no structure

2016-06-25 02:55:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and makes the homeless turtles

2016-06-26 17:43:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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very sad until they realize

2016-06-26 21:39:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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that they have had enough of this

2016-06-28 13:00:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and get the hell out,

2016-06-28 16:59:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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leaving everyone in the

2016-07-01 11:30:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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streets envious, and they started

2016-07-01 16:14:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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to build their own country

2016-07-01 23:46:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which they named "Peopleville" and

2016-07-05 18:20:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the people in Peopleville were

2016-07-05 20:24:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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very happy because they were

2016-07-05 22:40:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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finally having a place to call

2016-07-05 23:38:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Pizza Hut and ask for

2016-07-06 06:02:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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some delicious pizza

2016-07-06 12:42:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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except that it's not delicious

2016-07-06 17:07:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and its made of skin

2016-07-07 07:22:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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so Pizza Hut shut down,

2016-07-07 18:20:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and the people raged

2016-07-07 21:54:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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because they wanted pizza, so

2016-07-08 00:32:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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they took all the ingredients

2016-07-09 16:50:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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from the sushi restaurant and

2016-07-10 03:08:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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Cooked a spicy Sir monacle plushie who

2016-07-12 06:19:00 Author: Sir monacle Posts: 4155

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became the leader of the people

2016-07-12 15:54:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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but then people realized

2016-07-12 23:03:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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that he was corrupt, so

2016-07-13 03:30:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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they burned him and

2016-07-13 09:57:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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instead elected L1N3R1D3R as

2016-07-13 17:02:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the Mayor and TenebrisNemo

2016-07-14 10:15:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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as the head sheriff, however

2016-07-14 22:09:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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it was said that a Dark Lord

2016-07-15 12:32:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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possessed Nemo to bring destruction

2016-07-15 16:45:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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to the Peopleville and

2016-07-16 11:54:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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L1N3R1D3R had to protect them

2016-07-16 16:59:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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but he was unaware that

2016-07-16 22:08:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Ali-Star had the same plan

2016-07-17 19:50:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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expect that he needed dragons

2016-07-18 06:12:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which L1N3R1D3R accounted for, so

2016-07-18 16:09:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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they hunted the Dark Lord, but

2016-07-19 08:57:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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the Dark Lord was on Nemo's

2016-07-19 16:50:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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flying hippo, and he

2016-08-05 11:17:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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baked pizza for the people

2016-08-05 23:00:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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of Mordor, little did they know

2016-08-06 12:17:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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that they would get pizza

2016-08-06 18:08:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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from the fires of mount Doom

2016-08-06 20:00:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which is just the right temperature

2016-08-07 18:24:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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to heat up 5 000 pizzas at once

2016-08-08 11:33:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which Pizza Hut could only dream of,

2016-08-08 16:39:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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therefore Pizza Doom was

2016-08-10 06:33:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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created and replaced every

2016-08-10 16:30:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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Pizza Hut of the country

2016-08-12 03:19:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which was all part of

2016-08-13 01:06:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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Quake conspiracy to create a

2016-08-20 14:29:00 Author: NathanBros Posts: 213

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empire ruled by NathanBros

2016-08-20 15:11:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and his green & red bros

2016-08-24 01:29:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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who would run every pizza store

2016-08-24 17:50:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and eat pizza everyday

2016-08-24 20:26:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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all in the name of

2016-08-25 17:02:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the big man himself...

2016-08-26 06:40:00 Author: Zachinator Posts: 120

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...Sir monacle, who was secretly

2016-08-26 16:06:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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planning the resurrection of

2016-08-27 01:37:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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LBPCentral.com, but he needed

2016-08-27 17:51:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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powerful souls to complete

2016-08-27 22:59:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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this task, so he tried asking

2016-08-28 15:52:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the local citizens of the lovely town,

2016-08-28 18:09:00 Author: Zachinator Posts: 120

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but none of them wanted

2016-08-28 18:34:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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because Sir monacle had a bad reputation

2016-08-28 22:51:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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for not following any rules and

2016-08-29 13:46:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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saying mean things to the village, like

2016-08-29 15:47:00 Author: Zachinator Posts: 120

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"IX II IX XII" and they got offended

2016-08-30 07:27:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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because Roman numerals are the spawn

2016-08-30 23:10:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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of Julius Caesar's rotten thumbs

2016-08-31 09:31:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and fingers, which he probably

2016-08-31 13:46:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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used to swipe himself in toilet

2016-08-31 15:29:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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while hunting smelly Pokemon's

2016-08-31 20:12:00 Author: NathanBros Posts: 213

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rare candies, but then he

2016-08-31 21:52:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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realized that that was gross

2016-09-02 03:55:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and just threw his phone

2016-09-03 04:18:00 Author: Zachinator Posts: 120

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into the toilet and flushed it,

2016-09-03 05:07:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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until the phone transformed into

2016-09-03 09:42:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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the Kraken and began destroying

2016-09-03 16:01:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the very town Sir Monacle needed help from

2016-09-03 19:04:00 Author: Zachinator Posts: 120

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and everyone was screaming

2016-09-04 11:18:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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"Oh no, help us" when suddenly

2016-09-04 22:15:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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L1N3R1D3R and his Rosen army

2016-09-05 10:58:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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attempted to face the Kracken head on

2016-09-05 15:16:00 Author: Zachinator Posts: 120

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with sleds and poopy spears

2016-09-05 17:22:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which didn't work, but luckily

2016-09-05 19:33:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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one Michael Rosen made an

2016-09-06 10:52:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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oversized plum gun, which L1N3R1D3R

2016-09-08 04:39:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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used to annihilate this spawn

2016-09-08 09:17:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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of the devil and finally

2016-09-09 02:41:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the Kraken blew away into

2016-09-09 09:30:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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an egg with a strange

2016-09-10 01:14:00 Author: NathanBros Posts: 213

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smell that reminded L1N3R1D3R vaguely

2016-09-10 02:05:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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a rotten thumb which was

2016-09-10 12:01:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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stolen by Sir monacle himself

2016-09-10 18:17:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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when he felt special

2016-09-10 18:58:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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things were happening somewhere in

2016-09-11 18:57:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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his head, next to the

2016-09-11 20:29:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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White House where Obama was

2016-09-13 03:44:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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packing his stuff and

2016-09-13 10:33:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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preparing to welcome the new

2016-09-13 13:53:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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president, TenebrisNemo and his

2016-09-13 16:48:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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followers who wisely abandoned

2016-09-14 03:30:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the planet of Sir_monacles

2016-09-14 09:44:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and Donald Trumps which

2016-09-14 13:49:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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were ruining that planet with

2016-09-14 19:24:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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their bad logic that somehow

2016-09-15 03:46:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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was seen as good logic by them

2016-09-15 09:29:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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because they should have just

2016-09-16 13:43:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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used the things called brains

2016-09-16 16:34:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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but nooo, they decided to quit

2016-09-16 23:43:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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being humans and started to

2016-09-17 11:30:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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run for president to ruin

2016-09-17 20:05:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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their homes like there was

2016-09-17 20:43:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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a hope for America, except

2016-09-18 19:08:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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there wasn't hope for them

2016-09-18 22:03:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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so they all escaped to

2016-09-19 13:37:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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Hell, where they found out

2016-09-19 15:33:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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a Doom portal to Mars

2016-09-21 00:05:00 Author: NathanBros Posts: 213

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which they quickly took because

2016-09-21 04:33:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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they thought it was a good

2016-09-21 11:10:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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place to escape from hell

2016-09-21 13:36:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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but Mars was full of demons

2016-09-21 14:03:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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proving that Christianity was indeed

2016-09-22 04:34:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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a religion full of lies

2016-09-22 11:21:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and deception, so Nemo and

2016-09-22 23:48:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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his followers came up with a plan

2016-09-23 00:06:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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to destroy all churches that

2016-09-23 13:41:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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were spawning the demons

2016-09-23 15:01:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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with radio signals, which started

2016-09-24 04:07:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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to summon demons from

2016-09-24 13:25:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Mars that traveled to Earth

2016-09-24 22:55:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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with surfboards in space

2016-09-25 00:32:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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powered by rockets, meaning that

2016-09-25 20:55:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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they're going to invade in style

2016-09-26 11:11:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and Captain Falcon will obviously

2016-09-27 22:34:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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wear his fashion clothes which

2016-09-30 02:13:00 Author: NathanBros Posts: 213

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will give him confidence boost

2016-09-30 22:01:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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as well as speed boost

2016-10-02 02:24:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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so he can protect Earth

2016-10-02 20:13:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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from aliens who pretend they

2016-10-02 22:20:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

---

come in peace, but in reality Xtrahuman is the person responsible for this thread which has horrible grammar and is growing rather slowly like no other thread has before, and just when you thought it was about to end, a marshmallow came down from the sky and squished its gelatin which oozed out all over my potato chips next to my TV remote which held all of the secrets to the forbidden temple of the Chia pet in addition to the channels of my TV which counted as high as 656 or 959, if you looked at the TV upside down, which caused the TV to turn the screen upside down for you and defied the laws of physics, however it's okay because I don't believe in the laws of physics because I am a creationist who likes cheese on the spaghetti I eat when Mario requests it for dinner while teaching Luigi how to carry a franchise on your shoulders during the 1929 depression which affected me, meanwhile I go on a search for a golden turtle with the power of flight for carrying babies and dropping them into baskets that were filled with snakes which were allergic to the babies, who scared the snakes which bit the baby, giving him an allergic reaction to biscuits cut in half with jelly in between to make a biscuit sandwich thingy that caused an explosion that ruined my reputation, and yet the baby ate too many sandwiches causing him to suddenly hate LBP2, so I then banished him to the land of large, sweaty buffalo, which promptly began to lick me in comraderie, then put me back in my mom's basement, which was filled with creepy giant octopi and oysters filled with oysters, so they could fill themselves with even more oysters so as to create an infinite loop of oyster-ception, causing the collapse of civilization as we know it without any wild xtrahuman to stop it... oh wait there he is, with ten pounds of fried pinto beans to save the world somehow, but pinto beans can't reproduce, so he had to grab a nice lunch, which had a sandwich and a pickle which was tasty, but the pickle was the TV again, which still was upside down but I flipped it, making people into Frankenturrets, so GLaDOS got a hold of a tank of neurotoxin, and she choked everyone in the Enrichment Center, but I was cast off into space, meaning everything in Aperture returned to more or less normal, until Valve made Portal 3, in which Wheatley returns from space after GLaDOS needs his help, because Chell is gone and Aperture needs test subjects, so GLaDOS gives Wheatley legs and arms and makes him a subject, so Wheatley is the playable character then, meaning he's not in space, so meme users spammed the internet with "I'M NOT IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE," which made Valve send out an update that replaced the space core with the curiosity core, but the fans got sick of hearing "Who are you?" instead of "I'M IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!!!," at which point I stepped in a pile of SHAAAAAAAAAVING CREAM, although it was rather messy and such, so I got a free refund from real estate agencies and cranky old men, and then I went to the park to go poop on the hedges while eating a lobster and being stalked by Orville Redenbacher, then I told him "Your popcorn is simply scrumptious!", when my dog ate the rest of it because it thought it was edible gold, when in reality it was just buttered popcorn which had been pooped on by that dog, until a meteor hit the dog and split him into a thousand puppies, which started to eat people's food from the park which lead to massive famine and caused massive groups of humans commit cannibalism just to survive, and then the survivors created their own religion that worshipped the god of TV and dogs who grants his disciples remote controls and dog food which they gratefully take and use for their lunatic intentions of taking over Jupiter and making it their ultimate base of weapons, factories, and other helpful equipments to take over the dog population of Saturn, but at that moment the dogs on Saturn made a huge skyscraper which intercepted the lunatic's airship which caused a giant explosion in the middle and, thankfully the dogs managed to survive somehow, and then they decided to make a counter-attack on the human population which resulted in the first Galactic War between humans and dogs in space, and in the end the human race was in threat to go extinct when suddenly a giant turret arose and started to shoot rapidly at the dogs, who whimpered in great agony and they had to go to the canine hospital to get treatment for their injuries which were all over their legs, making most of them invalid and severely inhibiting the ones who always deliver pizza to the bystanders, including the cats which were doing something suspicious on their home planet Felinia when the humans and dogs were busy going to other planets to get more resources for their weaponry and at that moment they heard a loud roar from another galaxy signaling the entrance of the squirrels to this realm, which meant the cats finally had natural prey to hunt for their kittens and eat them for dinner, except when it comes to cat population's official guards, who refuse to eat new animals unless they are proven to be tasty by the Institution of Feline Victuals which is owned by a large company that looks out for feline needs and the company's owner is a tuxedo cat named Muffins who is technically the ruler of the planet Felinia but also makes voyages to other planets which can be pretty dangerous especially if he has to cross the Acidway, Milkyway's neighboring galaxy, that, as the name implies, is deadly for having galactic clouds full of acid in the atmosphere, and so to avoid this, Muffins has created a special device which allows him to move past the acid clouds without harm, and so he uses it to reach an infamous planet which is known across the galaxy as Murrdurr, the dark planet and the home of TenebrisNemo, and that's why Muffins is currently undergoing surgery on his lungs so he can breathe long enough to kill TenebrisNemo's servants whom L1N3R1D3R liked, so he prepared for battle to support TenebrisNemo's prosperity by killing his servants which was a bad desicion because the servants were plotting against him all along and they were ready for the assassination of L1N3R1D3R but Muffins couldn't let that happen because he liked both L1N3R1D3R and TenebrisNemo's pizzas that had every topping imaginable so Muffins came up with a plan which involved the acquisition of Sleepy Shotgun which used sleep powder to make his foes sleepily sleep and to throw them inside a clown disguised bag for keeping all the candy away from the king of the moon, who desperately wanted some Butterfinger but couldn't get any because he is a king who by necessity eats only fancy foods except on Wednesdays when he gorges on all sorts of cheap candy and eats them like crazy until his stomach tells his body to stop but he won't stop, Bob now decided to steal from the King's candy chamber and was disappointed when he saw that all that was left was Butterfinger, so he exclaimed, but someone heard it, alerting the candy hungry guards that candy was being stolen by Bob, who was now experiencing major pain in the form of lashes to L1N3R1D3R who was apparently Bob's voodoo doll who was boiled in water and served to a bunch of slaves who were in a great happy feeling once the cat said "Tonight we feast!" and he began to chow on my signature diarrhea pasta while a meteor hit the pasta and splattered my face all over the news and onto the TNT which started to dance in front of midgets astronauts equipped with Sir monacle plushies with super cannons and suddenly the whole lot exploded into bits but then I woke up with a Sir monacle plushie who was so twisted that I burned him into a Sir monacle plushie who was burned by TenebrisNemo's other Sir monacle plushie who was wearing illuminati suit to activate his powers to dominate TenebrisNemo's bedroom with a pizza party witch who conjured a Sir monacle plushie to torture the actual Sir monacle with sticks and salt in basement "Russia Soviet Russia", where no one will survive the Sir monacle plushie's wrath, however L1N3R1D3R returned and saved Sir monacle and TenebrisNemo's Sir monacle plushie from the evil Sir monacle plushie, witch had a Sir monacle plushie for her wizard husband TenebrisNemo who loved his witch wife so much that he bought her a lollipop chainsaw with mega doom blast power and together they bought Sir monacle plushies for their future children in the mysterious planet of Murrdurr where Sir monacle plushie's monocles are being sold in local stores all over the world and the universe, where they plan to take over planet Munacle, which is home of the Ms Munacle teddy's evil secret lair full of dog population's secret weapons that she locked up because the weapons were powerful enough to destroy her entire mound of garbage in the Trazh moon, home of the dog population's good prince, Dogarus, great fan of Bozo the clown and a charismatic golden retriever with a peculiar interest for lollipops which are made by the Lollipop Guild in the sir monacle plushie's own home planet, also where the fat people are happy, round brownie population thrive, and pizza monsters wander the dank meme streets of the internet, wondering where the taco truck opens on Tuesdays for their weekly hamburger supreme special with taco meat, salsa, and cats which came from a mysterious wormhole, however the monsters favourite ice cream truck is closed due to the arrival of the Dark Lord TenebrisNemo and his sidekick Sir monacle plushie who obeys his master's every command to destroy humanity with destructive world end machines which operate using a giant remote control from Bozo the Clown's pants which are known from Bozo's story ark in Star Trek the Musical which is a well-known musical starring Brad Pitt as Bozo the Clown's pants in a tarantula pit with Ron Weasley who is suffering from hypothermia because he ate my chilly pepper with his macaroni, which resulted in causing him to gain gastro-oesophageal reflux disease which made him become a vegetable that tastes like a lollipop because Ron's wand was broken in such a way that anything he tried to cast backfired on Hermione and gave her awkward situations which involved her and Ron kissing while Voldemort was screaming "Why am I here?" while Harry Potter had to prevent Majora's moon crashing into the world; meanwhile, lazy Mario was eating some mushrooms and growing big so he could mass murder some turtles and put them in his soup of destruction and eat it with pleasure while taunting Browser who was so angry that he breathed fire, but as always he hired some turtles and I miss the rains down in Africa because they gave me joy because I am a lone ape who just wants attention and bananas, but you give them instead to gorillas and that makes me annoyed, so I call for the Ape force which will aid me in escaping from the prison of Azkaban along with Sirius Black, the godfather of the boy who lived for a few minutes before being bullied by a spell named Imperius, which forced him to commit suicide by using a spoon to poke himself in the earlobe but that didn't kill him so he then tried a golf-club right through his heart, SPLISSHHH and the result was breathtaking *ba-dum TSS!* and at the sight of this, Snape lost his mind and started to call his fellow colonels including John Brutus who is known for usurping his title from another colonel with an army of mice who ate through his provisions, "Oh what a poo", he said when Snake suddenly appeared and got in to a Bo Staff fight with Snape who called Dumbledore for help but he was busy trying to teach Harry something about magic and puberty, but eventually Moody joined the fight and they fought like monkeys until Hermione joined the fight and stopped everyone with her wand which had previously broken but was fixed by a magical wizard whose name was Harrybo's Grandad, but pointlessly he was never a granddad so I shot him in the face, however the dog population started to breed werewolves who always interrupted my sleep, howling and destroying my rare glass mini-me collection which made me so angry that I slipped on my robe and fell into a rabbit hole, at least I didn't get injured but a white rabbit with a ticking clock recruited me in the war effort against the wizards, so I equipped myself The Sword of Suns which is known to most as the godly blade is able to ward off evil with a single slice at the cost of one's stamina, but fortunately I got a stamina upgrade and I'm able to glue together my rare glass mini-me collection while fighting against the evil wizards whom I begin to attack with my fellow party members who get angry at me, but I find a way to repay them using my hair and gold dust, and now the lot of them follow me to the end of my days and constantly heal me, allowing me to fight against the wizards without having to worry about my health points, but sometimes they use the wrong spell and send me flying over the Grand Canyon so fast that I broke the sound barrier which sounded cool but ultimately caused fatal injury to my ears and the surrounding birds, which was reported to be an alien attack, but when the authorities arrived, they confirmed that the cause of the sound was none other than myself, a hideous​ alien called jimydog000, straight from the planet Frewquip, which is known to have extreme weathers such as raining tornadoes, snowing snowmen, and misty lava storms, which makes the meteorologist have a bad time to forecast all those weathers and so he's paid a thousand platinum coins a day to pay off his mortgage and to keep him satisfied, because he needs to see his reflection, where he notices that he has a huge nose which is considered by the residents of Frewquip to be a mark of intelligence and charisma but by the residents of Earth its considered to be a sign of stupidity, so the weatherman didn't have any fan clubs on earth and in fact, they find him to be an ugly abomination because of his nose, so he decided to make the people on the earth follow his will by pointing out interesting facts about their inevitable death, like how Elvis was the best but died anyway and how Michael Jackson died and that made the people on earth very happy, but the Earthlings were not amused so they decided to retaliate with guns that are so powerful and dangerous that their kitten-bullets make every object which they hit turn adorable, which was the ultimate fate of Purrey, the cat groomer who turned into a big slimy dog whence our frog got its legs checked out and jumped of a cliff, where it squished onto the head of an octopus that decided to take a nap but now it's angry and wants to unleash its anger upon everything, living or not so it starts exacting its anger but something was going on that made it stop and look like a Goofy because he suddenly grew long ears and heard everything what I did and forced me to pay him 5 000 000 bucks because I was not paying attention to the teacher who apparently was a sir monacle plushie who got killed by a darklord who shouted: "THIS IS MORDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR!" and then ran around the halls but accidentally ran against a pillar and died, causing internal conflict between dark lords and dwarves over who would inherit the Monacle Throne, the trial of kings begins in the pits of Sir monacle plushies who were late for tea time and got executed but this caused anger among the Sir monacle plushie forces who decided to attack the planet of maggots that ironically was being ruled by Sir monacle maggot who is known for breaking the rules he's set for himself and thus ruining life for him and everyone else who have lived on that planet including Nemo who is sitting on the Darklord's throne and L1N3 who was enjoying the ride of his glorious sled, but little did he know that he was on the dark castle's lawn, which meant that the dark castle was too big for the dark lord's own good so he left and donated the castle to starving children who liked to eat the castle's stone pillars because it tasted like chocolate and it brought happiness to their faces, but little did they know about the secret lair below the castle which stored 892 bars of heavenly chocolate which turned them into gods of all chocolates and so if you've ever heard of the milk man, you should know that he worshiped little kids who became chocolate gods and their names were Billy, Sarah, John and Bob, who was the leader of the bunch, you know like the old Greek god Zeus who, apparently, is comprised of four children that embody the four elements of the world, water, earth, fire, windmills, except there weren't windmills because Don Quijote destroyed them which upset Michael Rosen, who created those windmills when he was in Ms. Goodall's class which is known to have a strict no-breathing policy which is ridiculous because if you don't breathe, you will get a cancer which will kill all the bees in Europe, causing natural disorder and reducing amounts of honey, making Winnie the Pooh very sad and start searching people's houses for honey, but one day he found Tigger who was jumping around and yelling cuss words, which was caused by annoying gorillas stealing his signature song and destroying his home with rocket launchers, so Pooh decided to put things right and drown them in honey, which was a success but led to Pooh being arrested and sentenced to death by Piglet, a major environmentalist, who was furious because of Eeyore being lazy and not working for the community because he walks too slowly and tries to build homes for the homeless turtles, but what he doesn't know is gravity which collapses homes that have no structure and makes the homeless turtles very sad until they realize that they have had enough of this and get the hell out, leaving everyone in the streets envious, and they started to build their own country which they named "Peopleville" and the people in Peopleville were very happy because they were finally having a place to call Pizza Hut and ask for some delicious pizza except that it's not delicious and its made of skin so Pizza Hut shut down, and the people raged because they wanted pizza, so they took all the ingredients from the sushi restaurant and cooked a spicy Sir monacle plushie who became the leader of the people but then people realized that he was corrupt, so they burned him and instead elected L1N3R1D3R as the Mayor and TenebrisNemo as the head sheriff, however it was said that a Darklord possessed Nemo to bring destruction to the Peopleville and L1N3R1D3R had to protect them but he was unaware that Ali-Star had the same plan expect that he needed dragons which L1N3R1D3R accounted for, so they hunted the dark lord, but the Darklord was on Nemo's flying hippo, and he baked pizza for the people of Mordor, little did they know that they would get pizza from the fires of mount Doom which is just the right temperature to heat up 5 000 pizzas at once which Pizza Hut could only dream of, therefore Pizza Doom was created and replaced every Pizza Hut of the country which was all part of quake conspiracy to create an empire ruled by NathanBros and his green & red bros who would run every pizza store and eat pizza everyday all in the name of the big man himself... ...Sir monacle, who was secretly planning the resurrection of LBPCentral.com, but he needed powerful souls to complete this task, so he tried asking the local citizens of the lovely town, but none of them wanted because Sir monacle had a bad reputation for not following any rules and saying mean things to the village, like "IX II IX XII" and they got offended because Roman numerals are the spawn of Julius Caesar's rotten thumbs and fingers, which he probably used to swipe himself in toilet while hunting smelly Pokemon's rare candies, but then he realized that that was gross and just threw his phone into the toilet and flushed it, until the phone transformed into the Kraken and began destroying the very town Sir Monacle needed help from and everyone was screaming "Oh no, help us!" when suddenly L1N3R1D3R and his Rosen army attempted to face the Kraken head on with sleds and poopy spears which didn't work, but luckily one Michael Rosen made an oversized plum gun, which L1N3R1D3R used to annihilate this spawn of the devil and finally the Kraken blew away into an egg with a strange smell that reminded L1N3R1D3R vaguely a rotten thumb which was stolen by Sir monacle himself when he felt special things were happening somewhere in his head, next to the White House where Obama was packing his stuff and preparing to welcome the new president, TenebrisNemo and his followers who wisely abandoned the planet of Sir_monacles and Donald Trumps which were ruining that planet with their bad logic that somehow was seen as good logic by them because they should have just used the things called brains but nooo, they decided to quit being humans and started to run for president to ruin their homes like there was a hope for America, except there wasn't hope for them so they all escaped to Hell, where they found out a Doom portal to Mars which they quickly took because they thought it was a good place to escape from hell but Mars was full of demons, proving that Christianity was indeed a religion full of lies and deception, so Nemo and his followers came up with a plan to destroy all churches that were spawning the demons with radio signals, which started to summon demons from Mars that traveled to Earth with surfboards in space powered by rockets, meaning that they're going to invade in style and Captain Falcon will obviously wear his fashion clothes which will give him confidence boost as well as speed boost so he can protect Earth from aliens who pretend they come in peace, but in reality ...recalls ​the thread

2016-10-03 12:39:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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they want to steal all our

2016-10-03 13:40:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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brains by sucking them with

2016-10-03 21:30:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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twisty straws, and then they

2016-10-04 04:04:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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are surprised when Cpt. Falcon

2016-10-04 12:20:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Falcon Punches them in the

2016-10-06 04:21:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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far corners of the outer space

2016-10-06 17:02:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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which was heard around the

2016-10-07 04:13:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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universe, even in planet

2016-10-08 11:41:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Earth which was millions of

2016-10-08 21:43:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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Captain Falcon mains who

2016-10-10 02:38:00 Author: Zachinator Posts: 120

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don't care about respect

2016-10-10 13:25:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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over old smelly happy people

2016-10-13 02:36:00 Author: NathanBros Posts: 213

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so they often visit

2016-10-13 04:06:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the therapist, Zachinator who

2016-10-15 18:46:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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advises them to Falcon Punch

2016-10-15 22:32:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the people who annoys

2016-10-19 02:54:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Grammar Nazis for that verb

2016-10-19 13:33:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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until they shout "t?? peli imee"

2016-10-20 12:31:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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and rampage and destroy

2016-10-21 00:32:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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the people who try to

2016-10-21 13:50:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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oppose them without using the

2016-10-21 16:14:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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holy symbol of Bob

2016-10-24 11:34:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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on their Bibles, which would

2016-10-24 13:38:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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cause starving children become

2016-10-24 21:32:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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even more starving and probably

2016-10-24 22:48:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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reach immortality by making

2016-10-25 10:57:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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their stomachs turn inside out

2016-10-26 04:58:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

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and then they will rule

2016-10-26 11:36:00 Author: TenebrisNemo Posts: 11336

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Mars and make the Martians

2016-10-26 22:48:00 Author: L1N3R1D3R Posts: 13447

Posts: 1077139    Threads: 69970    Members: 9661    Archive-Date: 2019-01-19

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